Frodo and Merry One-Shots

She's Nothing But Trouble

Frodo and I were sitting in the kitchen, having our afternoon tea. It was a beautiful day in the Shire. The sun was shining brightly through the kitchen window. I quietly sipped at my tea and nibbled on a freshly baked seed cake.
All of a sudden, there was a loud knock on the front door. "Who's that?", I asked Frodo. "I don't know. I'll go see who it is.", Frodo replied. Frodo slowly got up from the kitchen table and headed towards the front door. When he opened it, Frodo saw Lobelia Sackville-Baggins standing right in front of him with her arms crossed. She had a neutral expression on her face.
"Hello, Frodo.", Lobelia grumbled. "Hello, Lobelia.", Frodo replied, timidly. "What brings you here?" Lobelia refused to answer Frodo and she trudged right into Bag End. Frodo closed the door behind her. "What are you doing here?", Frodo asked her. "I thought you were going to offer me some tea.", Lobelia snarled. "Tea?", stuttered Frodo. "Yes. Tea. Well, don't just stand there. Take me to the kitchen." Frodo suddenly grew anxious. If he took her to the kitchen, then she would see me. Frodo knew she would criticize me.
"Wait here.", Frodo told Lobelia. Lobelia shook her head, in disappointment. "Don't be long.", she snorted. Frodo scurried to the kitchen. "Brianna, I have some bad news.", he said, anxiously. "What bad news?", I asked. "Lobelia Sackville-Baggins is here!", Frodo whispered. "She is? Oh, no. What if she finds me?", I whispered back. Frodo told me about how much trouble she was. He didn't want her to see me because he knew she would have something horrible to say. She would most likely criticize me because I was a human. Humans living among hobbits is not common in the Shire and most hobbits thought that humans were too loud and bothersome.
Frodo told me to follow him. I got up from the table and followed Frodo from behind. He led me down one of the hallways. "Why don't you hide in your room and I'll keep her distracted?" "Alright, Frodo. How long is she going to be here?" "I don't know. But, I'll try my best to get her out of here. Hide, quickly."
All of a sudden, Frodo heard footsteps coming down the hallway. I darted into my room and quietly shut my bedroom door. I heard Lobelia's voice from outside my room. "Frodo? What are you doing out here?", she hollered. I pressed my ear to my bedroom door. "Nothing, Lobelia.", Frodo responded. "Are you hiding from me?", she growled. "No.", replied Frodo. "Then, what are you doing?" "I had forgotten to....to....tidy up Bilbo's study.", Frodo stuttered.
Frodo held his hands behind his back, nervously. He let out a quiet chuckle. "Are you hiding something from me, Frodo?", Lobelia asked him. "No, I would never hide anything from you, Lobelia. I swear." "Then, why are you standing in front of that room? Is somebody in there?"
Lobelia looked over Frodo's shoulder. "Why would you think that?", Frodo asked her. "Nobody's in there. Just some old books and papers and such. Nothing important." "Harrumph!", scowled Lobelia. "You are a such an strange young man! Are you going to serve me tea or not?!"
Frodo shook his head, quickly. "I'm sorry, Lobelia. I'm afraid I'm out of tea. Sorry." "Humph!", snorted Lobelia. "I guess it was a mistake to come here. Frodo, will you show me to the door?" Frodo let out a loud sigh. "Alright."
He nervously escorted Lobelia out the front door. Frodo locked the door behind him and darted back to my bedroom. He knocked on my door. "It's safe to come out now.", he reassured me. I slowly opened up my bedroom door and looked up at Frodo. "I'm so sorry about that.", he apologized. "What a dreadful woman." "She didn't sound too friendly.", I mumbled. "I heard her outside my bedroom."
"Oh, dear. Let's hope that never happens again.", Frodo sighed. "Now, let us continue our afternoon tea in peace and quiet." "Good idea, Frodo.", I chuckled.