What About Forever {l.s}

XII

Harry's POV

    Moving to a new town was supposed to be a positive thing- "a new beginning" as my mum called it. I don't think anyone gets a new beginning, you just get a new end.
   No one ever one told me there was this law of the Earth in which you need to lose something everytime you gain something else. Every positive has a negative reaction. You make a new friend, you lose an old one, it's just how it works. It only hurts if you fight to keep them, grabbing onto them as tightly as you can, and you think you have them, they're yours forever but really they're slowly slipping away. Then suddenly you wake up one day and they're gone and in no time they're lost in a thousand faces.
I was extremely nervous to tell Louis that I was about to leave the town.
  We had been dating almost two years. For middle schoolers, having a relationship lasting more than four months was unheard of, so Louis and I were practically married. But having to hide for two years wasn't all it cracked up to be. Louis was afraid to come out, probably because he knew everyone hated me for it, so I promised him we would stay platonic when in public. It was fine at first, but it became increasingly difficult as we started to see more of each other to not grab his hand in the halls or kiss him after soccer games, especially when everybody around us was doing it so easily.
It was a Wednesday and I was at his house sitting on the porch with him after eating sandwiches his mum made for us. I was busy admiring the way the sun made his eyes sparkle just a little bit more than usual when I decided that if I didn't tell him then, I might end up leaving without him even knowing.
   "What are you saying?!' Louis yelled after I tried to explain.
I hadn't told him the real reason we were moving, because I never told the full truth. Telling the full truth at this point would mean me doing a lot of extra explaining of stories that I didn't want to tell.
   "I'm saying my mum wants us to move. I could make some friends at a new school, people who don't already know who I am." I said to him calmly.
   I had for the most part learned to stay relaxed when Louis yelled. He yelled a lot. It was like he was afraid to show signs of weakness. I could always tell he was upset, but he would let it out as anger and although it scared me, I knew that things would only worsen if I let it get to me. 
   "But I'm never going to see you."  He said, gently touching my hand.
   "My mum...also thinks we should spend some time apart. She... thinks we're too close and it's unhealthy."
It was true. I had forgotten how to survive without Louis. Perhaps I was trying to leave him because I was so scared of him leaving me, wondering what in the world I would do without him by my side.
      "What bullshit! I'll take care of it. I'll have to have a mature chat with her, don't worry. I always knew she didn't like me! Well whatever, we don't need her, right?" He said.
   Silence.
   "Lou-"
   "What?"
   "Well I just... I sort of agree with her.
   Silence that stabbed me.
   "Oh." He finally said, his voice breaking. He looked everywhere but at me.
   "I'm sorry."
   "Harry, are you breaking up with me?"
   Our eyes met- tears threatening to spill from us both.
   "Not forever, just for a little while. I'll come back," I said, not sure of who I was trying to convince, me or him. "We're leaving Friday. Mum was hired for a job that's closer to the new house so we gotta be moved in by Monday. But we could hang out before that, one last time? I mean we can still hang out later on, the house is only about an hour away."
   "Harry, don't bother," He stood up to go back into the house. "You're already gone."
   That was the last time I saw Louis before college.
      I walked home, a sobbing mess. My mum was in the living room taping shut over-filled boxes when I walked in. She glanced up at me from the box of kitchen-ware and sighed loudly when she saw my face.
   She had grown used to me coming home in tears, knowing that I wasn't accepted at school but what was new was that it was not a bully this time, it was now Louis who had usually been the one to wipe up my tears not cause them.
   "Can we leave even sooner than Friday? Like tomorrow?" I cried as she crouched down to hug me.
   I breathed in the familiar scent of clean laundry and sweet perfume.
   "You're so strong, Harry. So strong."
   "Tomorrow, Mummy?"
   "Yeah. We can try. That's all you can ever do, give it a try."
   "I don't want to leave him." I sobbed.
   "I know, baby. But if it's meant to be, it'll be. If he's the one, he'll come back to you."
   That was a promise that I never forgot.

   im in the middle of writing the next chap so it should be up by sunday at the latest. i might go in and add pics/gifs for the last few chaps and i may edit some other ones but yeah :)
happy fall :)
x Emily