What About Forever {l.s}

XXII

Harry's POV
song reccomendation: Another Love-Tom Odell
   Slowly, I enter the dark, booming room that's music you can hear from outside the building. Orange and purple lights flash from all around me and spiderwebs, skeletons, and bat decorations also join the party.
   Zayn's friends swiftly come over and swoop him away, leaving me all by myself in a jumble of clowns, cats, vampires, and characters that can't be identified.
I feel slightly underdressed seeing everyone's fun costumes, as I didn't have one so I just wore all black. I wonder what Louis dressed up as.
   I head over to the large buffet that's cluttered with eyeball-cupcakes, blood punch, and things of that sort. I take a water bottle and a cookie that looks like a jack-o-lantern and stand off the side where there's less people. Everyone is gravitated towards the center of the room requesting their favorite halloween jams from the DJ and dancing the night away with their friends. Looking around, I can't see anyone that I know, not that I'm really searching for anyone except one person.
   I'm feeling lame and lonely and I'm on my third cookie before someone yells my name. I spin around to see a guy in a green costume with a toothy grin on his face.
   "Niall?"
   "That's me."
"Hey, how are you? Are you supposed to be a... Leprechaun?"
He laughs. "Yeah, I'm Irish so my friends thought it would be fitting."
"It is," I giggle. "You look great."
   I'm relieved to be talking to someone finally, and I'm so glad it's Niall. He has such a wonderful bubbly personality, someone who can instantly make you smile. He finds joy in the littlest of things, laughing and joking always and his laugh is contagious. My mood is instantly lifted.
I haven't spoke to him since the last party, where I first met him. I didn't realize before how much I needed someone like him to be talking to right now. I'll have to remember to grab his number before the end of the night.
   He tells me Louis' been ignoring him too, not that I'm surprised. It seems like Louis' shut out nearly everyone that could possibly care about him, but I understand what that's like.
   I catch him up on the drama with Bradley, telling him how I think Louis' crazy for throwing away something great.
   "I see where you're coming from but Louis really doesn't need the backlash from it and you know he would get it."
   "I know, but he's going to need to learn to face it eventually. I think he should just be with the person who makes him happy and ignore what people think about it."
   He shakes his head. "He wouldn't be able to. If anything, he'd end up in a worse place than he's in. He'd end up beating people up, you know he can get. It'd be a nightmare."
    "I think a nightmare would be having to hide who you are. Confine to what everyone expects you to live up to. Denying your feelings for someone because some people don't like it." I say.
   "You know, I don't think Brad even likes him that much anymore. But whatever, it's not really any of our buisiness, it's his life and if he wants to hide then he'll hide."
   I don't respond, because he's right, I know he is but I can't help but feel like Louis' buisiness is mine too. And what if Louis doesn't know what's best for him? Am I supposed to just stand back and watch until something goes wrong?
...
   It's a little later, and the DJ just announced a slow song is about to be played.
   "Here we go, this one's for all you lovebirds out there who requested a slower song to dance to, so get your partner and get ready for a not-very-spooky but extra romance-filled song!"
   Niall asks if it's alright if he leaves me to go ask this girl he's had his eye on to dance with him, and I say yes because I believe that you should chase after love and see if you can catch it. Regardless of what people think.
  I head to the back where everyone without dance partners is huddling.
   "Hey, Harry!"
   A girl with black rabbit-ears and long blonde hair stands in front of me. She wears a black dress and painted whiskers line her cheeks. She's not dressed as slutty as most of the girls here which I appreciate.
   "Hi, uh...Alyssa?" I try.
I recognize her after a minute, realizing she's from my math class. I've spoken to her on a few occasions, mostly about equations but speaking nonetheless. I immediately thought she was very sweet and seemed like the person you could have some fun conversations with. I feel an instant connection to her as I felt with Louis when we first met. It's a feeling that doesn't come often, so if you feel it you need to take advantage of it.
I wouldn't mind being friends with her.
  "Alison." She kindly corrects.
"Right." I chuckle.  She smiles and I notice she has dimples like me. I think she's pretty.
"I know it's weird because like, we don't talk, but uh, do you wanna dance with me? My friends are all with their boyfriends," She rolls her eyes. "So I just thought I'd give it a shot to feel less like a loner."
In any other case I would make up an excuse and politely decline, but the way she asks speaking so casually, I can tell she's just looking for someone to dance with without an strings attached, while some girls would assume we're dating after I shared one dance with them.
   "Well, lucky for you I would love a dance partner"
   "Wow, I feel pretty lucky." She says sarcastically.
   I reach out to get hold of her hand, leading her to where all of the other couples are dancing.
   I place my hands by her hips feeling just a bit uncomfortable, she rests her arms around my neck.
   She chats to me about her friends and how annoying it gets when they favor their boyfriends over her. I only hear half of the gossip because as I'm glancong around , I see a boy. I see him amd his hands are attached to someone's waist, a girl's , and they gently rock, holding eachother as if they're holding onto their future.
  "So, who are you here for?" She asks, catching me by surprise.
   "I just came with a few friends."
   "Oh, that's it? I was hoping for more."
   "What do you mean?" I ask.
   "Well, you didn't come to dance with me. So I was asking who you came to dance with."
   "What makes you think there's someone?"
   "There's always a someone. That, and you keep looking around like you're trying to spot someone."
   "Yeah, there is someone. But he-they're with someone else." I admit.
I blush at my slipup.
    "Harry," She looks me in the eye. "It's alright if that someone is a he."
   "He's with someone else." I say quietly.
   "So are you." She reminds me.
...
    The song ends, and I ask Alison for her number before she goes off to her friends. I figure I could use some more of those.
   I can't seem to look away from Louis and the mystery girl and before I think anything through, my legs are walking seeminly by themselves over to where they stand, talking and laughing together.
   He glares at me at me then back at her. They are way too close together, the fronts of them nearly touching.
   Both of their faces are painted white- they planned this. This wasn't just a case of not having someone to dance with like Alison and I, this was them talking on the phone deciding what to wear together.
   "Can I talk to you for a minute?" I ask shooting both of them a subtle yet effective death glare.
    "Yeah, what is it?" He asks.
   I wait for her to step back but she doesn't budge. This bitch is relentless.
   "Can I talk to you alone?" I hiss.
   "Why don't you go get us some more punch?" He tells her, hand on her shoulder.
   She nods respectively, staring at him the way I do, like nothing else in the world matters but his eyes.
    I watch as she leans over and pecks his lips.
   I blink back tears while she slowly moves away from her.
   "So." I start, waiting for an explaination, feeling as though I deserve one when maybe I don't.
   "So, what?" He plays dumb.
  "Who is she?"
"Jacey."
"You're here...with her? Where did she even come from? Do you always whip out a coverup girlfriend whenever you begin to look suspicious?"
"She's hardly my girlfriend, Harry. I'm just here with her, that's all. She's just a friend."
"Oh, so that was just a platonic-friendly-goodbye kiss?"
    I don't mean to be jealous, I really don't, but I just can't help it. Seeing his lips on hers shattered me.
"Listen, she likes me so I thought I'd ask her to come with me. She knows we aren't a couple and-"
"Does she?!"
"Yes! And it's none of your fucking buisiness anyway. " He growls.
"You're leading people on."
"Jacey'll be fine."
"But will I?!" I choke.
"We aren't even... we arent..anything." He tells me.
"I know, I know, that's what you've been telling me over and over and I guess it is me not you, because you're constantly telling me it's nothing, we're nothing," I take a deep breath and I notice he's waiting for me to continue.
"But then we...spend time together and it feels like its more than nothing, so I tell myself there's a chance, just the slight off-possibility that you could be feeling more than nothing too, and I start to think that maybe what we have is something.
But then, you go and tell me to leave you alone, that I'm too clingy and you're so sick of me, and I realize how stupid I really am for living in this fantasy world, because it's clear in reality that I'm just an annoyance to you and trust me I know, but I have been oblivious, I guess I'm just blinded, by love or whatever you wanna call it. But Louis I think that I'm in love with you, that must be it, because I can't seem to stay away from you. But trust me, after tonight you won't have to worry about me because I can't do it anymore, my heart can't take it." I swallow hard.
I see the defeat on his face. I want him to say something but he doesn't, he just looks at me.
I want to dance with him. That's why I'm here. I came to be with him, for him to see me and drop everything and everything would be okay again. But he doesn't care about me. He doesn't care. I need air. I need to leave. I need to leave.
I take one last long look at him before forcing myself to walk away. As soon as I turn away from him I feel tears threatening to spill.
I hear Alison calling my name as I increase speed and run out the door.

im updating kinda late and its sunday but ive been a lil busy so yea but i didnt even prood read this so i appologize for mistakes and if the writing in general isnt the best but i hope u enjoy :)
xx Emily