You Love Me

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Chapter 25 - You Love Me

DAVID MILES

To say Dave was stunned was an understatement. Dave didn't even recall saying anything as such. He wouldn't spew this shit. Not to his Tess.

"What did I say Tess?"

"Forget it. It doesn't-

"It matters. What did I say Tess." He repeated. "Word by word. I want all of it. And don't say that you don't remember some of it. I know you do. "

She dropped down on the carpeted floor and folded her legs. "I was so happy. Logan proposed Lexi and I wanted that you know. I dreamt of it, you going down on one knee. More like I was gonna propose. But I thought I'd, you know, come live with you. And see where it goes.

"I packed everything I could. I didn't even wait to talk to Lexi about her engagement. I was out of the house the very next day. I was so happy, Dave. That was the last time I ever felt heart-soaringly happy. Even after wining multiple cases in court, I never felt that happiness.

Shaking her head, she hugged her knees and rested her chin on them. She was staring at nothing in particular. That vacantness, that haunting dark gaze of hers caused an ache in his chest and he found himself rubbing his sternum as if someone punched him.

" I stayed at a hotel and I was so nervous. But I was sure that you'd let me live with you for a while.

"It was raining cats and dogs. I was soaked and chilled to the bone. I knocked. You opened the door and the first thing I felt was your hot breath yelling 'What'?"

Dave raked a hand as with every word that escaped Tess's lips brought back the memories.

"I could smell the alcohol in your breath. I said hi and you said 'When are you going to leave me? I don't want you. Get that through your head. "

"Fuck." He muttered. He remembered saying that. He had thought she was a memory. An illusion just like he saw her everywhere.

"Please Dave. It's raining. I told you." She didn't seem to be here in the present. "You grabbed me and pulled me in roughly. I fell down. Scrapped my knee on the glass shard that seemed to litter your floor.

"You asked me why I was there and I told you that you left me without telling me anything about it. You said that I was too dumb to get it through my worthless brain that you don't want me that you left because I was annoyingly clingy. I never was Dave, I swear. I swore then that if you felt that I'd give you more space. You screamed at me Dave."

"You threw your glass at me. Luckily, I ducked."

"Ah hell!" This was getting worse by the minute. He remembered every fucking thing he did. All because he thought she was just an illusion.

"When that didn't make me leave, you  sat down at your mini bar and poured a glass for yourself. Downing it, you said that atleast I'd left my sister. That even she was getting tired of me trailing behind her. And that I would end up alone. I would still hide behind her fame because I was useless. Worthless. I was just another addition to the population and nothing else.

"I would end up all alone, drugged lying on the floor because no one would care if I lived or died. Especially you. You wouldn't give a fuck about it because I was just another girl you fucked. I was one of the many that seems to run behind you thinking that I could tame you.

"You said that atleast Lexi didn't turn out like my mother. You didn't know that Lexi had adopted me. All you knew was my mother died of overdose. That nobody liked her. Nobody attended her funeral. And you said nobody would attend mine.

"Lexi would replace me with Logan. And I would end up alone and die alone."

"I told you that you didn't know what you were saying. I told you to go to sleep so we'd talk come morning. You didn't agree. You threw another glass at me. It hit me in the shoulder. And you fucking smiled. You smiled as it hit me.

"I fell on my ass. You walked over to me. Hauled me up by my elbow.

" "Get out. Leave me alone. I used you. And now you're just another nuisance." These were your exact words. You threw me out. Literally threw me out on the road and closed the door on me."

"And now you expect me to just let you be because you were drunk. Tell me Dave, if Sydney was there instead of me, would you have done the same thing?"

She didn't let him answer she was back to the present as she looked at him with the same vacantness.

"Tess, no. Stop."

"Why, Dave? Don't you wanna know what happened?"

"Tess please. No more."

"I know about Sydney because that day when I went to Lexi to resign, Lexi asked me if I met Sydney there. Because Sydney went to see you the same day I did. Only difference was I came to you at night. She came to meet you next morning."

"You let Sydney in. You were drunk then, too. You didn't sleep that night. You know what you did, Dave?"

"Tess..." he begged her. He didn't want to listen.

"You kicked me out but you embraced her and cried in her arms. You handled me roughly that I was bruised but you took another girl in your arms. Funny thing, you didn't insult her by saying that she was another notch on your bedpost. Instead you cried and you said you'd never let her go."

"Tell me Dave, what was I supposed to think. Should I let everything be because you were drunk? I never insulted you. I never did anything to you. I just loved you and you love Sydney. Tell me, did you both laugh at me at how naive I was to fall for you?"

"Tess. I'm so sorry. I know that sorry doesn't cover it. Shit. You're right. You don't deserve me. You deserve so much more. Sweetheart I'm sorry."

He slid down and walked on his knees to her.

Taking her hand in his he looked in her eyes. "I promise you, Tess. I'll never bother you."

"You're crying." She said and wiped her finger over his cheek.

"I didn't know. And I swear Tess. I'll drop you at your place. I promise I won't bother you ever again. You don't deserve this. You don't deserve me."

"You're leaving me. Again." She slapped his hand away.

"I said don't make me do this. But you did. And you're leaving me again."

"Tess..."

"I told you, I wouldn't survive this. Fuck it. I was too stupid to think.. never mind."

"What do you want me to do Tess?" He yelled.

"I wanted you to grovel. I wanted you to apologize and promise me you wouldn't do that again. I wanted you to promise me to never let me go. I wanted you to fucking just say that you love me, you son of a bitch."

With that Tess got up and ran out leaving Dave broken and crying on the floor.

********

Ah shit!!

Even I cried while writing that. It hurts alot when somebody says that you didn't mean anything to them, doesn't it?

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- Nami

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