Until I Really Do

UNTIL YOU (PROLOGUE)

London, 1901

It wasn't until the sun began to lighten up the sky with its rays piercing through the curtains that covered the window, did Ethan begin to feel the weight of staying up all night, sink into his rigid body.

He glanced at his fingers that were now becoming stiff from holding a pen all night, and flexed it. A soft yawn escaped his lips.

Deciding that he was too tired to go up the stairs to his now empty bed that no longer possessed the sleeping beauty with long, straight mass of dark brown hair, or the warmth that her body provided, he brought his head to a rest on the massive mahogany table before him and pulled his eyelids close.

He would sleep for about an hour, giving in to the darkness and illusion of peace that his sleep would create. Then, he'd be jolted awake by an invisible alarm clock set to go off in what was left of his broken heart.

Ethan would never concede to being heartbroken out loud but deep down, he knew he was. Being shamed by the woman he loved was one thing, but being pitied by his servants was another. Ethan Williams was a rich, powerful, twenty eight year old man with lands and vessels spread across England. He would have a lot of things, but he would never have pity.

Somewhere in the midst of his busy mind, he must have drifted to sleep, for he was suddenly jolted awake by the banging and shaking of the massive wooden door that managed to keep him locked up in his study, away from the prying eyes of his servants and the desperate hands of the town's spinsters. The news of his wife's disappearance had traveled fast enough to have the entire London at his door step by morning, begging him to marry them. A frown settled on his face.

The continuous banging on the door was powerful enough to jolt him back to the present. With a sigh, he pushed his aching body to his feet and slowly began walking toward the door. He'd scold whoever it was that was bold enough to disturb him but he knew it had to be urgent for his servants were wise enough to avoid him especially considering his sour mood since Juliet left.

Releasing the latch that secured the door, he pulled it open, the weight of the door almost proving to be too much for his tired body. As the door gave way before him, Jacob appeared. Jacob's gray hair stuck to his wrinkly forehead, held bound by water that was now dripping off of his face. His blue eyes spoke of urgency and while he stood before Ethan with his hands clasped before him, he waited patiently for the command to speak.

Ethan nodded once, giving Jacob the opportunity to address him.

"There's a problem, my lord." The butler's blue eyes seemed frantic but he managed to maintain his composure. "A child was left on the door step. No one knows at what time this event occurred but the maids were left with no choice but to bring her in, considering the intensity of the late night's rain."

Ethan blinked, twice. He heard Jacob clearly, perhaps too clearly, but his mind was unable to comprehend the words being spoken. A child. It was the most absurd thing he had heard his entire life.

Releasing a deep, tired breath, "This child was abandoned?" He asked, his eyes searching Jacob's for any sign of foul play. While the butler had worked for him for five years and proved his allegiance, Ethan couldn't help but be suspicious.

Jacob shook his head. "A note addressed to you was found in the child's basket."

"Where is this note?"

"With the child, my lord. She is with Adeline right now. If you are willing, I shall take you to her." Jacob bowed slightly.

Ethan thought of rejecting the offer. He didn't want to see a child right now especially because he knew what he was going to do with her; send her to the orphanage where abandoned bastards like her belonged. But he thought better of it; someone had the audacity to dump a baby on his doorsteps with a note: curiosity demanded that he read whatever it was the person had to say.

With a nod, he waited for Jacob to lead the way and followed silently as they walked through the dimly lit hallways. He lived in an ancient castle, restructured to appear more modern. Yet, it still held the grandeur and mystery of a castle. Ethan had only purchased it with the huge inheritance his late grandfather and father left behind simply because Juliet, his wife, loved it and had always had a childhood dream of living in a castle. Ethan's fingers balled into a fist as his mind wandered to Juliet and her schemes. He clenched his teeth, and shook his head, choosing instead to focus his attention on the path, and the task ahead. When they reached the underground part of the house reserved for his servants, he was greeted by some of them as he walked the hallway of their quarters but he didn't stop to acknowledge them.

Jacob finally came to a halt before a small door and knocked. A few seconds later, a young maid with brown hair and brown eyes, appeared with a bundle in her arms.

"My lord."

Ethan heard her address him but his eyes were planted on the bundle. Moving forward, he pushed the swaddle aside and came face to face with a red cheeked baby whose thumb was buried in her mouth as she slept. Her head was covered but he could see strands of short, black hair resting comfortably on her forehead. What struck him the most about this child was her resemblance to his late mother.

"Adeline, Lord Williams demands to see the letter that came with the child." Until he spoke, for a second, Ethan forgot Jacob's presence.

"Of course." Adeline held the baby forward and Ethan immediately accepted her into his arms. "I didn't mean..." The young maid blushed.

Ethan offered her a small smile, knowing she didn't mean for him to hold the child but had intended to give her to Jacob. But there was something about this child that tugged on the strings of his heart and he was happy to have her in his arms.

Adeline immediately disappeared into the room and reappeared a few seconds later with a piece of paper in her hands. She handed the paper to Ethan and reached for the child. Reluctantly, Ethan put the child back in her arms and opened the note.

Ethan,

Congratulations on being a father. I tried motherhood for six months and failed. Good luck.

Juliet.