Ryan's P.O.V
Crazy to believe that just a few weeks ago I was a nobody, not even loved by his parents. Now, I am on my way to becoming a somebody, a famous somebody.
Brendon's mother dropped me off back to my house after I once again assured her that I'm fine. Luckily, my own mother was not home yet and I just went to my room where I have been sitting for the last hour.
The phone on my lap buzzes and I grab it a little to quickly to see a text from Brendon. I never explained where I had come from or why I was running, but I still don't have the heart to tell him, I can't do that to him right now when he is so happy.
I reply to Brendon and decide to call someone else, someone I probably shouldn't, Lizzie. Two rings and she picks up.
"Hey Lizzie, I need to get away for a bit. Do you think you could pick me up?" Lizzie agrees and I hangup.
For some reason, I take my shirt off to switch it for one not covered in sweat. I choose a nice blue tshirt and slide it over my head. At least now I don't look like I've just finished a marathon.
It only takes 10 minutes for Lizzie to get to my house and when she does, it looks like she has just woken up. I slide into the passenger side of the car and buckle up.
"Did I wake you?" I ask and she waves me off saying she had to be up anyway. That doesn't stop the slight guilt I feel still brewing in my gut.
"So what do you need to talk about?" She looks over at me as she turns off the radio and sets cruise control.
"Not here, I'll tell you when we get to where we are going." She nods in understanding and turns the radio on to a familiar song.
Brendon's voice plays over the radio to a song even I haven't heard yet.
"Where did you get this?" I turn in my seat, facing her more than I was a minute ago. I'm sure the record company hasn't sold any records yet, and Brendon surely doesn't know Lizzie.
"I work at this record company and we just signed this band. Panic! At The Disco I believe they are called." She smiles and sings along to the song.
What a small world it is.
"This is my boyfriend's band...erm...my band." Her mouth drops open at my comment and I can't help the blush that is spreading across my face.
"YOU are the new guitarist for the band? No way!!" She smiles widely as she turns into a gravel drive to a small house. I can only nod my head again.
####
"How long have you been playing guitar?" Lizzie sits cross-legged on her bed and invites me to sit on the other half, which I do.
"Not very long, I still don't think I'm good enough to be in a band, but Brendon insisted." She nods and doesn't ask anything else.
The air of the room changes and I feel suffocated by the serious nature. Words try bubbling out of my mouth, but I swallow them before I can say anything I regret.
The longer I wait, the more the words want to come out. They swirl around my brain over and over again, switching spots again and again. Finally, they have calmed and taken their rightful spots in an order that makes sense.
"I'm scared Lizzie." She looks at me as I wring my hands together in anxiety.
"I'm scared to lose Brendon, and I know he is scared to lose me. Although the loss I feel probably won't hurt for long."
She gives me a look, but I wave her off, not ready to explain it to her. She respects that and moves closer to me, laying her head on my shoulder.
"You won't lose him Ryan, he will be there for you until the end." She takes my right hand so I stop ringing it and places it on her soft cheek.
To my surprise, my hand comes back wet with her warm tears. She looks at me with pity that digs deep into my soul and makes me squirm.
Again, the air feels strange in the room, but it is more physical this time. My lungs burn at the intake of air and don't expand all the way. I can't help but to start sucking down air again faster and faster yet.
My lungs burn relentlessly and strain with the effort of taking in the air, so I lay on the bed to give them a break. Lizzie whispers sweet nothings to me as she rubs my back, trying to calm me down.
The burning increases as the rapidity of my breathing does and it hurts to breathe so I stop for a little while.
The relief is instant and I don't want to breathe again, so I don't. I hold my breathe until my vision starts going dark. At least if I pass out it won't hurt anymore.
The last thing I see is Lizzie yelling something at me, but I cant hear her anymore.
Brendon's P.O.V
Ryan seemed strange when I dropped him off, but he assured me that he is fine.
"Hey Pete, want to come over mine? I've been seriously neglecting you." He agrees and I clean my room really quickly before he comes over.
Once Pete gets here, I lead him upstairs to my room where I lay on my bed while he goes and turns on the xbox.
"How is Ryan?" He turns to me, an unreadable emotion on his face. I feel like this is a touchy subject, but if he is the one asking...
"I'm not sure. He doesn't seem okay, but he keeps insisting that he is fine. I'm scared though Pete."
He sits on my bed as the game starts up, controller in hand.
"Why are you scared?"
"I'm scared to lose him. He is the best thing in my life right now and I can't imagine life without him."
"I'm sure you won't have to Brendon, you are both young. Nothing bad happens when you are young and in love."
For some reason I feel like the world is collapsing upon me at his words. Maybe he is right, but what if he's not?
I'm sooooooo sorry I haven't updated this earlier. School is killing me but only one year left. Also sorry that this chapter sucks so bad, but I'm trying. I just need to get back into the swing of this story.
For a little bit of fun, comment what you think should happen next and if I choose your idea, I'll give you a shoutout on the chapter.
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love never dies (a ryden fan fic)
Romance"brendon i cant." ryan whispers seductively in my ear as i lay there. "ryan, we were meant to be, who cares what your mom thinks?" i see tears in his eyes as he gets up and turns away, ive hit a nerve. i get up and hug him tightly from behind. "no o...
