Brendon's P.O.V
"What? You just got out of the hospital, how can you be sick?" My words come out a little choked, fear and confusion wrapping themselves around them.
Ryan looks up at me and gently grabs my hand. His feel like ice against my skin and I try my hardest not to pull back. His eyes are starting to fill with tears. With each laboured breath he takes, the room empties of air until my lungs burn with need.
His silence causes my mind to travel to places I never wanted it to go, thoughts I never wanted to have. Ryan has cancer, he must. Tears spring to my eyes as that realization hits. That can't be. No way. The argument continues in my head until Ryan snaps me out of it by hugging me with a grip so tight I'm convinced he is touching my bones.
"They found a cyst in my brain. Right now it's fine but they said it has been growing since I was 13." I look at him, shock clear on my face. Relief flows through me, allowing air into my lungs again, but only for a few seconds as the reality of what he said hits.
Before I can ask, Ryan goes into more detail. "If it grows 4 more millimeters, they will have to operate to take it out or it may kill me." My heart clenches at the news. at the thought of losing the one person who means everything to me.
"How long do you have?" I wince as the words come out of my mouth sounding cold and distant, nothing like I wanted them to. Ryan grabs both sides of my face and forces me to look at him. Love and adoration swim in his eyes, but there is no fear there, not even the tiniest bit.
"Brendon. This doesn't mean I'm going to die. It just means I have to go to the doctors more often. You aren't getting rid of me that easy." He cracks a smile and I can't help but smile too even with the gravity of the situation weighing on me.
The air around us changes as the tv emits a laughing sound. I had forgotten there was even a movie playing, but now it seems the perfect way to distract us. Though I want to know everything about this, I can tell Ryan doesn't really want to talk about it anymore so I let him be and turn back to the movie.
He rests his head back on my lap and lets out a laboured breath and usually, I'd be worried but seeing as how he just got that off his chest, I understand. I take his hand and give it a kiss.
###
My phone buzzes angrily on the table next to me, making a horribly loud sound. I grab up the phone before it can wake Ryan, but it seems to be too late as he mumbles something and moves in my lap. After a few seconds, he calms down again and I answer the phone.
"Brendon! I've been trying to reach you for ages." Pete yells into the phone, sounding a little out of breath. My mind instantly takes a dark route and my heart races.
"What's wrong??" I whisper into the phone.
"Oh nothing," He giggles. "I'm at a party. I've got the best news!" after he says this I hear him talking to someone else and music blaring in the background.
"What is it? It's one am." I can't help the irritation in my voice. I had just gotten Ryan to sleep and if Pete ruins this and wakes him up I'll be pissed, Ryan looks so peaceful.
"They are playing your songs! They love them and offered Panic! a gig." My eyes widen and I have to hold myself back from jumping up. This is the first gig Panic! has ever been offered.
"That's amazing! When and where?" Ryan rustles again and I hold my breath.
"I'll text you the details. I've got to go." Before I can even say goodbye he hangs up the phone. My heart does a little flip in my chest. Other than Ryan, music is what I love the best.
YOU ARE READING
love never dies (a ryden fan fic)
Romance"brendon i cant." ryan whispers seductively in my ear as i lay there. "ryan, we were meant to be, who cares what your mom thinks?" i see tears in his eyes as he gets up and turns away, ive hit a nerve. i get up and hug him tightly from behind. "no o...
