Every Bad Thing

Chapter Thirty-Three

I've already showered and dressed up when I stepped out of Orion's bathroom. This isn't the first time that I stayed the night in his place. I've been drunk countless of times, and he has always been there to pick me up from the venue and fix me.

My hands stopped from drying my hair with a towel when I found a topless Orion sitting on the side of the bed. Nakayuko siya at parang may binabasa. I brought my eyes to what he's staring at and found him holding my phone. I know it's mine because it's white and gold, matte black ang iPhone niya. The cookie found out my passcode again.

I shook my head and walked towards him. I peered on the phone and saw that he's reading my conversation with Seth. He lifted his head up and looked at me with irritation on his face.

"Are you still seeing that fresh grad professor?" he asked me, sounding a bit disgusted. I rolled my eyes and grabbed my phone from him. "L, he's old."

"He's not old. He's just twenty-eight. And... We're just harmlessly dating."

"Just like what we're doing?" his voiced was laced with accusation.

I laughed, shaking my head. "We're not together, Orion."

"We can be." he gravely said. 

"Don't make me laugh." I smirked. "You love being single. You love having a wide variety of girls to choose from."

I turned my back on him and walked to the rectangular mirror placed on the wall. He trailed behind me. I could see his reflection on the mirror. I resumed rubbing the towel on my air.

"Is that the issue here? My loyalty? I can be loyal, Laurene. I can change my ways. I can be happy with just you." his eyes were hard and piercing me, like he wants me to believe him.

My hands halted. I closed my eyes and breathed in deep before turning my back on the mirror to properly face him.

"You can't, Orion. And we can't, not when I can't give you what you need, not when I don't let you go all the way." I somberly replied. His forehead creased.

"What? It's not about the sex, Laurene." his jaw went taut. His face contorted in pain but his eyes never looked away from mine. He licked his lips. "I love you."

"Did you remember that you love me when you fucked Kyla? And Tish? And Pam? And Veronica? And a bunch of other girls?" I asked him, reminding him his conquests that I know of for the past years.

Maybe he does love me. But love isn't just enough for him. Sex is in his system. He can't just turn his back on it. Kung kaya niya, sana ay dati pa lang nagawa na niya.

"Is that really the issue, Laurene? Or is it because you still love him?" he snapped. I flinched. He inhaled sharply at my reaction. "You still love him."

 My guards went up. I failed to answer and quickly looked away, not capable of staring back at his cold and harsh eyes anymore.

"Mahal mo pa rin siya? Kahit apat na taon na ang nakalipas? Kahit na hindi ka na niya mahal? Kahit na wala na siyang pakialam sa'yo? Kahit na may iba na siya? Mahal mo pa rin siya?" his voice raised by the second. Rage fired up in his eyes. 

His words lashed my heart. My chest ached. Invisible blood dripped from it. No one can see it, but I can perfectly feel it. And it damn hurts. My eyes blurred. I bit my lip.

"Move on, Laurene! It's been four fucking years!" he lividly yelled, his enraged voice bounced inside the four corners of his room. I inhaled sharply. I  furiously shook my head at him, my own anger was consuming me.

"Yes, it's been four years! Four years, pero nandito pa rin!" I dropped the towel and pointed at my chest, right where my damage heart is. "Nandito pa rin yung pagmamahal, yung pangungulila! Nandito pa rin yung sakit! Nandito pa rin siya! You don't know what I feel so don't tell me to move on!"