Doctor Bieber | JB

31 | Toothpaste

DOCTOR BIEBER | thirty-one.

S.

"You actually forgave him?" Val asked in shock. "I mean, I had a feeling you would, but I didn't think you'd actually do it."

Val bounced up and down as she carried Devon in her arms. We were all around the island counter in Val's kitchen catching up on a few things since Ryan was at work.

"Sienna, I love you, but he cheated on you. How can you go back to a cheater?" Kendall asked as she leaned over the counter.

"It's been more than a year. Am I supposed to hate him for the rest of my life? I can't help that I still love him a-and I didn't go back to him. I just forgave him. He knows he did wrong," I explained.

"How do you even know that he loves you? I swear that when he cheated he said 'I love Sienna, but I'm not in love with her.' It sounds to me that he doesn't know what he wants," Kendall confessed.

"Remind me to never go to a restaurant with him because obviously he can't make a decision," Val scoffed as she put Devon down. "Go with your sister," she guided Devon over to the living room couch where Samantha was watching TV and playing with toys.

"He said that?" I asked quietly. "He said he wasn't in love with me anymore," I looked at Kendall seriously.

"Yes and I am a witness," Val admitted as she walked back over to us.

"Val, you told me to follow my heart and I did! Why are you now telling me this?"

"Okay, first of all, I kind of forgot. It's been a damn year. I have more serious things to worry about than Justin's clear indecisiveness. Do you know that I have to plan the annual Butler family reunion? How in the world am I going to plan a family reunion?" she ranted quickly.

"Breathe, Val. Breathe," Kendall laughed softly. "And honestly Sienna, follow your heart, but maybe you should make sure Justin's heart is in the right place."

"It is in the right place. It has to be," I whispered the last part.

-

I played with the ends of my hair nervously, pacing up and down the guest room. Val's and Kendall's word kept flashing in my mind. Why must I be so indecisive?

Why can't I just say, 'No, Justin. You cheated on me. We're done.'?

Or why can't I just say, 'Justin, I don't care about what anyone says. You're the one for me and they're all wrong,' and stick with it.

The whole day I was thinking about Justin. Val went with Kenny to the park with the twins and I stayed behind. My mind was going back and forth.

Stay with Justin.

No, end things with Justin.

No, stay with him.

No, end things.

I laid on the guest bed looking up at the ceiling. I was starting to have a headache.

Why must I be so indecisive?

I glanced at my phone, debating on whether or not I should call him. He's probably working so I probably shouldn't... But then again, if I don't, then I'll probably end up avoided this whole thing as a whole.