kiss me * wwe fan fic

five

I'm looking outside my window watching the butterflies fly across. Spring is here. The flowers are blooming and the sun is shining bright.

Right now I should be outside with my friends. Somewhere at the beach, probably getting wasted.

My phone lights up and I grab it from my nightstand. My phone has 34% of battery. I never charge my phone anymore.

It's been so long since I've charged it because I never use it at all. "xoxonikki posted a new picture!"

I unlock my phone going to my Instagram. In fact Nikki did post a picture. It's a picture of her, Brie, Kaitlyn, Emma, Renee, Alicia, Natalya, and Summer.

They're at the beach and they look so happy. Nikki's caption is "having fun with my beauties just missing you @blackwidowxx 😘"

My heart sinks to my stomach and I put my phone down. My friends are having fun without me.

They always call and text me. They even come to visit. It's just hard. It's hard not being able to have fun with them.

A girl my age shouldn't be stuck home alone and blue. I turn my attention to the floor. Even looking outside makes me sad.

•••

"Come on honey let's get you ready for your appointment." My mom says. "I don't want to." I say.

"Aj we don't have time for this you know we have to go. Come on I'll help you shower." She says grabbing my hand.

"I don't want to go. I just want to stay here." My mom sighs and sits down on my bed. "Please, Aj. We don't have time for this."

"What's going on here?" My dad asks walking in. "Nothing." I reply uninterested. "Aj doesn't want to go to her appointment."

"Honey you have to." My dad says. "I told her but-" before my parents start ranting about it I speak up. "Okay, okay."

I remove my blanket from the bed and I'm about to get up, but I forgot I can't. My dad catches me quickly and I look down embarrassed.

He walks me to the bathroom where he sits me on the closed toilet. He then walks out leaving my mom and I alone.

•••

"Has the medicine been helping at all?" The doctor asks. I nod my head and he looks back at the chart.

"Doctor Smith, I think she needs some more medicine." My mom asks speaking up. I turn my attention to her as she speaks up.

"What do you mean ma'am?" The doctor asks. "She seems sad all the time. Her mood changes so much it's not normal."

"I'm fine." I say defensively. "No, you're not fine, April." My mom scolds. "Do you feel like your mood swings have affected your health?" The doctor asks.

"I'm okay." I say annoyed. The doctor nods his head and walks to the door. "Ill like to discuss some details on the medicine ma'am. Aj, a nurse will be with you right away."

They walk out the room and I don't even bother to stop them. Usually, I'd protest because they're discussing my health without me but at this point I don't care.

A nurse knocks on the door and peeks in. "Hello Aj. How are you?" She asks. I don't reply and simply look at her.

"Can you fill this out for me please?" She asks handing me a clipboard with piece of paper and a pen. "Sure." I mumble.

"Thank you. I'll be back later to pick it up." She walks out and I stare at the sheet that's on my lap.

"Do you feel hopeless and uninterested about activities you used to enjoy?"

"Do you feel like your mood affects your sleeping schedule and your appetite?"

"Have you ever thought about suicide?"

I stop reading the sheet of paper and sigh. "Hello, hello, April Jeanette how are you today?"

I glance up at the door and see leather jacket dude. A grin on his face like usual. "Ah I see you're not in the mood today."

He starts looking around the room like usual. "Did you bring any yummy gummies today?" After he stops digging around he turns to look at me.

"Rude." He says sitting in front of me. "What's that?" He asks taking the clipboard from my lap. He starts reading it and looks at me.

"What's this?" He asks confused. "Isn't it pretty clear? They want to know if I'm depressed." I reply. For the first time since I met him he's got a different expression on his face.

"Are you?" I roll my eyes, "Are you a doctor? Because I think not." He frowns putting the clipboard down.

"I'm a volunteer. Plus, my friend is a medical student so I know things." He says defensively. "Whatever."

"What's wrong?" He actually sounds concerned which is weird. I've only known him for a few days yet he's always sarcastic and uninterested.

"Nothing." I say looking him right in the eyes. "Come on you can tell me. We're best friends aren't we?"

"Best friends? No." He rolls his eyes, "Admit it were bffs. We bonded over gummies! That's a best friend for sure."

"Whatever." He sighs and leans in closer. "Are you going to tell me now April Jeanette?" His blue eyes are staring deeply into mine.

It makes me feel like he cares. Like I can tell him everything and anything. It's comforting in a way.

"I'm upset. Not depressed, but upset." I mumble. "Why're you upset April Jeanette?" He asks carefully leaning in closer.

"Because I'm boring. Because I want to be normal again. Because I miss my friends. Because I push them away. Because - because my life."

"Ahh. I see. It's okay. I'm here. I'm your friend. You can't push me away." He says with a small smile.

"I'll push you away eventually. Or you'll get tired of dealing with me." He burrows his eyebrows together.

"I think not. I mean you are tiring and pretty annoying, but I like you." He grins. I try so hard to not smile, but I can't help it.

"What do you mean you pushed your friends away though?" He asks suddenly. "Can we not talk about it?"

"Okay. That's fine." He says making me feel relieved. There's a knock on the door and Dean gets up abruptly.

"Are you-" the nurse stops talking when she sees Dean. "Sorry ma'am. I just came to say hey to my bff."

I cringe at his term "bff". Who even uses that? The nurse nods her head, "Well sir you have to leave please. The patient has to fill some personal stuff out."

"Oh yeah for sure. I'll see you later, April Jeanette." Dean says giving me a wink. For an odd reason I feel the blood rush to my cheeks.

Luckily, he leaves before he says my blushing red face.