For the hundredth time I check my hair with the reflection of my phone. I told myself I shouldn't feel this hopefully because the landfall is always painful.
Every time the cafe door opens I look up optimistically thinking it's him. But it's not. My phone lights up and the time reads 4:35.
Don't to worry Aj. He's only five minutes late. It's only five minutes. Five dreadfully long minutes.
I've been here since 4 not wanting to be late whatsoever. Pathetic I know. My coffee cup is half empty already.
I go ahead and finish drinking it. My palms are sweating. I've bit almost all of my nails. This waiting is killing me. Before I drive myself crazy I get up to buy another cup of coffee.
I'm about to hand the lady the money when I turn around and look at the table where I was sitting.
Dean is still not here. But when he gets here I'm sure he will want his large coffee like usual. So I order him coffee as well.
After paying the lady I stand waiting for the cups. Minutes later a young man hands me the cups and I go back to sit down.
I wait for my coffee to cool down then I take a sip. Before I know it I'm done with my second cup of coffee. Again.
The door opens making a sound and I quickly look at it. It's still not him. I look at my phone and see that it's already 4:57.
I wipe off the lipstick that was on my lips. Why did I try so hard? My heart sinks to my stomach. My breathing gets fast as I try to contain my tears. He stood me up.
"Do you need something else?" A worker that walks by asks. "No. I'm good. I was just leaving." I say staring at Deans cup in front of me.
The worker simply nods and walks away. I get up from the chair and pick up my empty cup along with the large one.
His coffee is already cold. On the way out I throw it away.
>>>
I stand in front of the building I've been dreading to return to. The wind is blowing making my body shiver.
Seth walks out of the building and he spots me in the distance. He approaches me holding a folder of papers tightly to his body.
"Aj? Hey how are you?"
"Can we talk?"
"Yeah sure. Do you want to go-"
"Can we talk in my car? I don't want to go in."
"Of course."
We walk to my car and I get in the drivers seat as he gets in the passengers seat. "What's wrong?"
"I'm heartbroken." I bluntly say.
"Oh. Whys that?"
"Dean stood me up. He wanted to meet up with me and he left me waiting. He never showed up like he said he would."
"Why were you two meeting up for?"
"I don't know. I thought we were meeting up because he wanted to see me, because he missed me, because he wanted to speak to me like I wanted to. But I guess not."
"Aj, I'm going to be completely honest with you."
"Please be."
"Dean has been in a relationship with Layla for a long time. He might've had feelings for you but you can't depend on him. You can't let him control your happiness. I honestly think he's not leaving Layla anytime soon. It's up to you to let go. It's not healthy for you to be so infatuated with him that you can't see reality. Do you honestly want to be the girl he meets in the shadows? Do you want to be the one he meets when he's not with Layla?"
"No." I breathe a tear spilling from my eyes. "I just want to be his only one. That's all."
"We can't always get what we want. I know this is hard Aj, but if you want to get better you have to let go."
"How do you expect me to do that? He made me feel things. Beautiful things. He made me feel so happy. And I want to feel that again. I don't want to feel this empty anymore."
I shamefully look down at my lap trying to stop my chin from quivering so much.
"I just want him so bad it hurts."
>>>
short chapter guys ;o im sorryyyy. i promise to try to update soon and i'll make it longer. thnx for reading and voting. it means the world to me :') much luv for you guys ;* ♡
