The Art Of Series

Being Perfect: 3

I felt exposed.

I was standing in an examination room, stripped down to just my bra and underwear.

This couldn't be legal.

"Go ahead and step up on the scale," the nurse said.

I turned to do so.

"I'm sorry, Emily. I should've been clearer. Step on the scale backwards."

I stared at her in disbelief. Did she just say to weigh myself backwards?

"It's against the program policy for patients to know their weight."

Of course it is. This just gets better and better.

I glanced toward the scale behind me, my stomach turning. How will I know if I'm still on-track? If I gained?

"Don't worry, Emily. It'll be alright."

Easy for her to say. Judging by her appearance, her outward appearance doesn't seem to be high on her priority list.

I took in a deep breath, pressing my stomach against my spine as I stood on the scale. Backwards.

I tried to imagine the needle moving behind me. Maybe it wouldn't move past 90.

Maybe I'd finally dropped into 89.

The nurse didn't hint at what it could be, instead just asking me to step down after her recording. "Thanks, Emily. That's perfect."

I flinched at the word, but she didn't seem to notice.

I'm not perfect. I know that. But I damn well will be, despite what this institution tries to do to me.

My bag was brought into the room. "Searched and cleaned," the woman said, before leaving.

"Go ahead and get dressed," the nurse said. "Do you know what contraband was taken?"

I shook my head.

"Did you read the institution rules?"

I nodded. But I'd hidden my laxatives good and well.

No way in hell did they find those.

The nurse took the list from the top of my suitcase. "They took a bottle of appetite suppressants-"

Forgot I had those.

"-a ribbon-"

Cut to the size I wanted to be. Of course they'd take my only way of keeping myself in check.

"-and laxatives."

I froze, raising an eyebrow. "They took what?"

She peered down at the list again. "Yeah, laxatives. Did you know those were in there?"

Of course I knew. "Where did they find them?"

The nurse shook her head, glancing back down at the paper. "Doesn't say."