Money Can't Buy Happiness

Chapter 32

Jax arrived home for a pit stop, fully intending on driving up to visit Katie and Charlie, but when he walked into the house he heard Abel's laughter from the hallway. He dropped his things and jogged down the hall to find Abel, Thomas and Tara on the floor on Abel's room. They were playing, smiles all around, but he could see the deep pain she was hiding for the sake of their children.

"Daddy!" Abel shrieked as he flew to his father who stood in the doorway.

"Hey buddy," Jax dropped to his knees and held Abel tight. "Were you good for Mom?" Abel nodded enthusiastically. "You take care of your brother?" Again, he nodded and Jax gave him another hug.

"Abel, stay with Thomas," Tara said sternly. "We'll be right back."

Jax leaned over to give the infant a kiss before following Tara to their bedroom. "I didn't think you'd be home."

"I didn't know if I would be," she shrugged. "Charlotte is your daughter?"

"She is," he said confidently.

Tara shook her head, "If it was any other woman I'd tell you to fight for custody, that we'd raise her, -"

"I'm not doing that to Katie," he said quickly.

Closing her eyes, Tara nodded, "I don't want to do that to her. I know you Jax, I know you want to be as much of a father as you can to her." He simply nodded. "Which means, everyone is going to know, eventually, that she is yours."

"I don't know," he shrugged. "No one wants Happy to know, he had a hard enough time dealing with what happened."

"You can't have it both ways," Tara said somberly.

"It's up to Katie," he huffed.

"I want to talk to her," Tara said, watching his face change from sorrowful to shocked and slightly embarrassed.

"No," he snapped. "So you can interrogate her? See if the stories match up?"

Tara didn't speak at first, she knew that was part of why but not the only reason. "No."

"Then why?"

"I don't know," she shrugged. "This is... I don't know what this is, Jax. Unreal? Insane? You can pick any adjective you want and I'm sure it would fit."

Jax shook his head, "She doesn't want to talk about it."

"I don't know what to do here," she admitted. "I don't know what I want to do."

Nodding, Jax turned away from her and grabbed an army green bag from the closet. "I'll let you decide."

"Where are you going?" She asked, momentarily fearful he'd stay with Katie rather than the clubhouse. Tara knew it wasn't like that, even if Jax's story was a lie and the sex was consensual and their own idea, the two of them didn't seem to want each other like that. Sadly for Tara, it was more emotional than anything.

"Clubhouse," he huffed as he packed. "I was going to head up to visit Charlie but," he searched for the right words, "I'm not," was all he could come up with in that moment.

"Go see your daughter," Tara said with bitterness in her voice.

"Where are you gonna be?" He asked, terrified of her answer.

"I don't know, Jax," her voice cracked. "Just go."

--

Jax didn't take her advice, he got to the clubhouse and called Katie to let her know he wouldn't be up. He didn't lie as to why but he didn't elaborate. Katie could hear the sadness in his voice, she knew it was Tara, but she didn't pressure him. They made plans for the next day and ended the call. Not long after she invited Happy to the hotel, to ease her overall loneliness and her specific urge to see him.

His attitude, his entire self really, seemed calmer when he stepped into the hotel suite. Katie was holding the baby, bouncing her a bit with every step, and Happy smiled at both of them with an exhausted look on his face.

"You look beat," Katie said with a chuckle. "You didn't have to come."

"I did," he mumbled, flashing the baby a little smile as Katie turned her back to him. "Plus I wasn't dealing with Mac all night."

"She that mad?"

Happy rolled his eyes. "I don't wanna talk about it."

"I'll ignore my nosiness then," she said only half joking.

"She saw everything," he huffed, "Knows who you are now, bullshit chick whining."

Katie laughed a little, "As a chick, I'm offended."

"You're not a chick," he said casually, pulling a beer out of the fridge. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," she shrugged. "You?"

"Nothing," he sat beside her on the couch. "What's the job?"

She hesitated, knowing how he felt about her profession in general, but decided to be as honest as possible. "Managing front of house," she started, "At an escort agency."

Happy bristled, "Who set you up with that?"

"The owner is an old friend of Alec," Katie explained. "I won't be, uhh servicing clients, if that makes you feel better."

"It does," he admitted. "You know I remember a time where you woulda just said you wouldn't be banging anyone," he looked at her.

Katie laughed, "Yeah, I know, but I'm trying to be more mature and sensitive to whatever this situation is."

"It's always some situation," he grumbled.

"I know," she stood, the baby sleeping over her shoulder, and gave him a sympathetic look. "I'll be right back, I'm gonna put her down in her crib." He nodded, watching as she scurried into the baby's room only to reappear seconds later. "It's like trying to move a bomb, I swear."

"That's why I don't touch em'," he joked. "You don't know what you're doing long term?"

"No," she pouted. "Sorry. I want to see how the job goes and how I feel."

"I want you here," he said sadly.

"You've expressed more emotions since I came back then you have the entire time I was here before." Katie held her tears back and stood, heading for the tiny kitchen area, but Happy didn't give her space, he followed closely.

"I never felt this much shit before, Kate."

"Sucks, doesn't it?" She asked, turning to face him.

"Yeah," he grumbled.

"We can't jump into anything, Hap," she said quietly. "There's too much still around, too much between us, to pretend like we're on solid ground."

"I know," he nodded, "I gotta deal with shit with Mac too."

"Exactly," and there was Jax, Katie kept thinking, but that was an impossible situation. "But I wanna see you."

"I gotta see you," he rushed toward her and kissed her, her body squeezed between his and the wall. Somehow he's forgotten the memory of her trauma but it rushed back quickly. "You okay?" He asked, ending the kiss. "Is this okay?"

"Yeah," she said breathlessly. "I want to feel something good from you, Hap. I'm tired of hurting."

Happy smiled and kissed her again, his hands roaming her body, before scooping her up to sit on the counter top. An empty beer bottle tipped and rolled and onto the floor, the broken glass inconsequential as it cracked and splintered under his boots.

"Here?" She giggled as he reached under her skirt for her underwear.

"Mm hmm," he practically moaned as his lips and stubbly chin ran along her neck.

Katie lifted herself up so he could pull her panties down before helping him with his belt buckle and zipper. "I love you," she sighed as she kissed him again despite the pit in her stomach. She feared this would blow up, this peace and happiness between them would crash and burn just like it had before.

"I love you too, Kate."