Hidden Bruises (vhope)

19

I stayed the rest of the day in my room. Lights off, laying down. I couldn't get up, i didn't want to. I couldn't stop thinking about that note. I had no clue what to do in this situation. Every situation i thought of ended horribly. I looked to the window.

It was dark and foggy outside. For the first time in hours, i stood up. I stumbled a few times, and grabbed the window sill to catch my balance. I guess laying in bed all day wasn't the best decision. But was what i was doing worse?

I knew i shouldn't, i knew it would only hurt those around me more. But once a fucked up life, always a fucked up life. I packed a small bag and threw on a hoodie.

I slowly opened the window. I stuck out my head, the winter wind hit Mr head as i looked down. It was maybe about 20 feet. If i was careful, i could make it.

I slowly turned around, and put one foot through the window. Then the other. I was dangling with my feet outside and my arms gripping on the wall. Then i slipped.

I quickly shot up my arm and managed to grab the outdoor window sill before i fell and broke my leg. Then i slowly let my hand drop from the window.

I bent my knees as i hit the ground to lessen the blow. There was a small thud as my feet hit the sidewalk. I slowly stood back up, and turned to face the road. I didn't bother to look both ways before crossing. When i made it across, i ran down the sidewalk. My bag bounced against my side as i sprinted through the town.

I went back to my old house. There wasn't anymore police tape. The investigation was over anyways. But no one lived there. Who would want to move into a house where a husband killed his wife? I walked up the stairs to the door.

The place looked tattered and uncared for. It didn't look good before, but it sure was worse now. I shook the door knob, and surprisingly, it was unlocked. I opened the door with a slight Creek, then closed it behind me as i walked in.

The inside smelt the same as i  remembered it. All the furniture​ was missing though. I walked through the living room, than the halls and the bathroom. Then i got to the stairs.

My eyes went wide, my heart started beating. I couldn't breathe. Why isn't there any air here? Then i saw him. I saw my dad.

" dad?" i asked. I shook. I tried to breathe but i couldn't. My heart raced and i grabbed my chest. Then i saw her. Mom. She was screaming. Dad had a knife. He held it up.

"Im tired of you bitch!!" he yelled.

"Dad stop!!!" i pleaded. I couldn't do anything. I watched him bring down the knife, piercing into my moms neck. Blood squirted out. "DAD NO!! PLEASE STOP". But he didn't. He forcefully twisted the knife out.

"Shut the fuck up kid!" he yelled at me. Then he stabbed her one last time...

... I woke up in a cold sweat on the floor by the stairs. Then u remembered what happened. I haven't had a panic attack like that since middle School. I must have passed out. I slowly stood up. The contents of my bag were spilled onto the floor. I slowly dragged myself to the items and put them back in the bag. It was almost 3 am now. I guess Taehyung didn't notice i left. That's good, i guess.

Part of me wanted him to notice. Part of wanted him to run to me and sweep me up so we could ride into the sunset on a white horse together. The other part of me knew the truth. That would never happen. And of it did, i didn't deserve it. My mind trailed back to the letter he gave me. I wish it didn't.

I felt the anxiety coming back, i needed something, anything to distract me. I rummaged through.my bag to find it. The tacks. They weren't very sharp, but they where all i had.

After making a few lines, i put the thumbtacks back in my bag. I slung it over my shoulder and walked upstairs. Back in my old room.

Ot was different. There was no bed. No dresser. No carpet. Just a plain, empty room. I should have thought this out more, but i was used to sleeping without a bed anyways thanks to my parents.

I walked to the upstairs bathroom. I looked at the plain looking area. Nothing but a toilet sink and shower. 1 cabinet on the wall caught my eye. It was where i used to hide razors and medical equipment. I smiled. I liked to take care of my wounds. It was one of the only times i did good for myself. That's saying something, isn't it?

I went back to my room. I knew taehyung might try to look for me in the morning so i set an alarm for 6 am. That should give me enough time to find a hiding spot in the city. I laid on the floor in the middle of the room and stared at the celling.

All i could think was... Im really doing this, aren't i?

Weekly updates again!! Yay!! I told you it would be back by november.