Bucky Barnes-The Truth Part 2

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*Contains Smut

The first few days after Bucky confessed what he had done; you didn't leave your room. Everyone tried to no avail. You were smarter than you led on, and even your brother Tony couldn't unlock your bedroom door.

Two days of nothing but crying and sleeping. The crying made you physically and emotionally exhausted, which in turn made you pass out. It was an endless cycle; one that you were terrified would never break.

After the first two days, things started to get better. You left your room at odd hours, making sure nobody was around just to sneak into the kitchen to grab food and then scramble back to your room. That went on for an entire week.

You even had to turn your phone off from the constant messages and phone calls. Tony, Steve, Natasha, and Bucky were all texting you and calling. But you refused to answer. You were mad at everyone because they all knew and kept it from you.

After days of thinking, you wanted to forgive Bucky. You weren't mad at him in general for killing your parents. You knew, without a doubt, when he was being controlled that there was simply nothing he could do. It was the fact that he kept the truth hidden from you for so many months; that's what hurt the most.

Glancing at yourself in the mirror, you groaned audibly. You definitely didn't look like the bubbly girl in love anymore. Your hair was a mess from not regularly washing it, dark circles hung under your eyes and you had even lost a few pounds; your sweatpants and t-shirt hanging off your now not toned body.

Looking at the clock, you knew almost everyone would be in the kitchen eating dinner. With a nod of determination, you held your head up high as you walked out of your room and to the kitchen.

Tony was the first to notice you; his fork dropping from his fingers as he stood up. "Y/N!" he choked out in surprise from not seeing you nearly two weeks. Your hand came up to pause him, not wanting to hear what he had to say. After all, you were pretty pissed at your own brother from keeping this information from you secret.

Swiftly glancing at the faces sitting at the table, your gaze fell onto Bucky's. He wasn't looking so good either and your heart broke at seeing him. His eyes were clouded by dark circles, his skin pale and his long hair was becoming stringy. In that moment of your eyes meeting, everything inside melted away; all the anger, the frustration. You didn't think you could ever take him back after what happened, after lying to you for so long, but now, all you wanted to do was to hold him in your arms.

A single tear rolled down your cheek as you found the courage to speak to him; to speak in front of everyone. "I....I forgive you Bucky" you managed to stutter out. The room went silent at your softly spoken voice; nothing but the breathing could be heard. Bucky's eyes went wide, his gaze glued to you; his lips parting as he contemplated what to say. He stood up from his seat but you held your hands up; his motions ceasing. With a quick nod of your head, another tear escaped your eyes before you turned around and headed back to your room.

~~~

"Come on Buck, just go knock on her door. She might open it this time" you heard Steve urge from the hallway as you stayed locked inside your bedroom. You were just about to take a shower for the night when you heard Steve and Bucky talking just outside your door, causing you to stop and listen in on them.

"I...I don't know Steve. I know she said she forgave me but I don't think she'll ever take me back. Hell, I don't expect her too. I messed up, I messed up bad." You could hear him let out a deep breath and your heart ached for him again; ached to touch him, to comfort him even though he was the one who broke your heart. "I'm going to hop in the shower, clear my head, and maybe I'll get the courage to knock on her door tonight" you heard Bucky say.

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