A collection of short stories centering around a kid named Sammy and a few of his friends, not so good friends, and straight up enemies. It's 50% simple vibes, and 50% teenage angst.
I didn't know what I was doing when I wrote this, and a lot of the...
Once upon a time there was a grand and prestigious private school named "Duke's School for Future Dukes" It was an all boys school and was famous for bringing forth lovely gentlemen, who excelled in academics and extra curricular activities including (but not limited to): Lacrosse, Polo, Diplomatic discussions, and Basket weaving. Attending this lovely school were many fine specimens of manhood, but one pupil stood out from all the rest.
This young man's name was Steve, and he stood out due to his huge lack of cleanliness and academic talent. He got ninety nines on tests, he did not take exceeding interest in the big boring discussions of 1849, and (horrors of horrors) after a truly intense round of basket weaving, his shirt often came un-tucked!!! He was truly the least successful of all the attendees of the school. Now of course, being the worst at everything was not the best for Steve's emotional health, and it slowly started to deteriorate. But then summer break came, and Steve had some time to really think about his life, and do things that he enjoyed; like making jewelry. (a pastime highly frowned upon at DSfFD.) But he was still on his best behavior, (even if it was worse than everybody else) and he tried very hard to be exceptional.
So one day he was going for a walk in 100 degree(that's 38 for all you Celsius people) heat fighting off sweat stains and heatstroke, when suddenly in a mirage he saw a glitter of gold "No!" he thought. "Why would gold just be lying on the ground? I must be imagining it." But as he drew nearer to the glimmer he realized it really was gold! (or fake gold to be more precise) A chunky gold necklace, and wearing the necklace was a young man passed out in the road. (Warning!!! Do not wear lots of black clothing and heavy jewelry in 100+ weather. Especially if you don't drink a lot of water. You could get heatstroke. And die.) Because this man fit all of the above criteria Steve thought this was what had happened to him, so he was surprised to find that the man was to all outward appearances (except for the fact that he was on the ground) completely fine.
Steve: "excuse me sir, why are you on the ground?"
Man on floor: "Someone stole mah rolo"
Steve: "Rolo???"
Mof: "Wheelchair"
Steve: "Why do you need a wheelchair"
Mof: "....I have no legs"
Steve: " Oh! how very unfortunate!!"
Mof: "Yup, I guess it is"
Steve: "What's your name?"
Mof: "Larry. But mah bros call me Legless Larry...Yo' know....'Cause I got no legs."
Steve: "Well it's nice to meet you! Can I assist you in any way?"
Larry: "Well.... Yo' could get mah rolo"
Steve: "Ro?... Oh.... Never mind. I WILL ASSIST YOU SIR!"
He started to run off to fetch the prosecutor. And fell on his face.
Larry: "Uuuum... Thanks but yo' seem to have some issues so uum... Thanks for tryin' dude"
Steve: "You're welcome, But I feel as if I have let you down."
Larry: "Naw bro, it's cool. Here, have some swag."
With this he gave Steve his necklace (fake gold remember) and they parted ways. Or rather Larry begged Steve to leave, and Steve kind of just wandered off to try and "help" someone else. But inside he was deeply moved. He wanted to be just like that man; so cool, so confident, and so.... Swaggy! So he quit school and started doing jewelry full time.
The moral for people like Larry: Just... Try not to get into these situations. It's awkward.
The moral for people like Steve: To make people give you what you want, just act awkward and inept until they pity you.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
