A collection of short stories centering around a kid named Sammy and a few of his friends, not so good friends, and straight up enemies. It's 50% simple vibes, and 50% teenage angst.
I didn't know what I was doing when I wrote this, and a lot of the...
Once upon a time there was a man. A man who was unlike any other man. A man who was the epitome of manly, for he was born just that; a man. While his peers were soiling diapers, drinking milk from bottles, and crying for their mommies, he was sprinting five miles with fifty pound weights strapped to his shoes, doing clap-pushups while supporting various livestock, and making grown men cry for their mommies. Two hours after his birth he apprehended an infamous bank robber who had been evading capture for years, at the not-so-tender age of two he arrested a vicious murderer responsible for the deaths of a whole continent's worth of warrior penguins, and when he was just five he moved the earth out of the path of a meteor using only the power of a sneeze and a spoon. He had no fears, and no fears could possibly hold him.
Shortly after his birth he introduced himself to his parents as Percy, tipped his hat, and exited the delivery room. This was, of course, so he could go fetch that nasty bank robber. Percy had no time for crime; it was the one thing in all the world that truly shivered his timbers, and his timbers would not stand for being shivered . . .
After a few run-ins with local police departments regarding the vigilante-style with which he distributed good and crushed evil, Percy found his true occupational calling. Turns out, policemen hated crime almost as much as Percy did, and although they were a bit hesitant to let an (technically) infant join the force, they were convinced by a quick display of his super-human strength and heroic self sacrificing nature.
So he joined the force and quickly rose through the ranks, soon he was employee of the week every day. Pictures of his face covered corridor walls and newspaper pages. Percy had found his purpose, the reason he had been placed on the earth, what he was called to be; a hero.
Policeman Percy: Defender of Justice and Kittens.
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