THE AFRICAN GIRL

Just make it stop

A/N: okay so my book is up to 300 reads and I just want to thank you guys for reading and voting. It's so exciting to be honest. Thanks a bunch!! 😘

♠Sheila♠

Ever felt like ripping your heart out? No. It's a terrible feeling then. Something or someone is pulling my heart or is trying to pull my heart out.

I am awake, yet again, at 3 a.m. I sigh and get out of bed. Massaging my eyes softly, I make my way down the stairs and into the kitchen with my phone in my hand because I am using it a flashlight. Why? Because Nicoles' mangy mutts are here. I never understood why Seth is always left behind, I mean he is my outmost favourite out of all of them. That used to be Paul though.

I put my phone down and open the fridge. Milk? I ask my self as my eyes scan the not so surprisingly filled fridge. Milk it is. I decide as I grab the bottle of milk and a long glass. I pour the tasty White substance in and close the bottle before putting it back in the fridge.

This is the worst feeling in the world. Love. I mean I watch movies and people have happy endings, children, by smiles, wonderful live. Mine crushed and ran. Literally, he crushed into a piano and ran the next day. How amazing right? I don't even know why I am thinking about this. Yesterday I got rid off everything that reminded me off them physically hoping it would get rid of the memories, it is not working. The full ache in my chest seems to remind me that they are gone and the constant cries of Bella make it worse.

I just wish, someone can reverse time, all the way back to when we were still in Africa and I would have made absolutely sure that mom never got that job! Home was not the best place, but at least it was better than this. Now I just want to crawl into a whole and die there, by at the same time. Want to prove to Jasper that he was not my everything, that I can go on without him.

My phone rings and I sigh. Bella. The name flashes on the screen, I pick up the phone and answer it.

"Of course you would be awake at this hour" was the first thing I say. She has made me her human diary or something. Not saying that I am not glad to help, it's just that. She wasn't the only that lost her mate and she is not the only one suffering so I find it unfair that she vents to me and when I try to do it to her she block me out. Some friend I got right?

"Charlie threatened to send me back to Arizona today" she says and I nod.

"Then go. Get out of this retched town" I said and she sighs on the other end.

"No!" She whisper-yells. "They might come back and I want to be here when they do" She says.

"Are we still talking about the two golden eyes vampires that decided it would be amazing to break our hearts and leave town with the lamest excuse in the vampire book?" I ask her satirically.

"They love us. They may come back" Bella tries to argue

"Is that before or after we die of heartbreak?" I ask her.

"Sheila..."

"No! I am tired of lying to you and myself, trying to justify what they did. Today you will listen. I have been listening to you vent on and on about this for months now. My turn" I say or growl, whatever tone I used. I didn't mean it to come out bad, I am just tired.

"Okay" she says and Smile proudly.

"Do you know the thing that I wan to do so bad right now Bella? I want to pack my bags and get on the next flight to Africa" I say and Bella sighs.

"You don't mean that. I have a way to make them come back" Bella says and I roll my eyes.

"Okay, so they come back and then what?" I ask "Mh? Are we going to run into their arms with the brightest smiles and make them join us for a campfire so we can sing Khumbaya?" I ask

"Why are you so negative?" Bella asks and scoff. That must have been a trick question because if it wasn't then Edward really broke her. How is she so positive anyways?

"He broke up with me through a letter, left town with no visit, my heart aches everyday Bella, I hardly sleep because of it. I lost my sister's support because I sided with them and they just upped and left like it was the easiest thing they could do and you ask why I am negative?" I ask and the was a pause on her end.

"I still love him and I will get him to come back okay" Bella says.

"They are not coming back! They left, left us, threw us out of their lives and have probably already moved on" I yell. Completely ignoring  the fact that the whole house might be awake listening to me right now "I'm sorry if you can't handle the truth Bella, but I don't want to see a Cullen ever in my life. I hate them to the core and I would rather die than accept them again" I conclude softer.

"No you don't hate them. They were our friends, Edward and Jasper are our mates" she pleads in the other end.

"Nah Bella, my mate wouldn't make me suffer like this. If you still do love them, then that's you loss. I am moving on forgetting they existed. You would just be hurting yourself more if you keep thinking they will return to you. I am trying to get over it, I suggest you do as well" I say sighing.

"I can't just give up on him!" She yells and I sigh again.

"He gave up on you didn't he? So why hold on if he didn't?" I ask and she keeps quiet. "I am not weak and I had a life before Jasper and I will most certainly have one after him" I says and hang up. I close my eyes and breathe in deep and breathe out.

"I am proud of you honey" I hear my mom say and I shrug. "Bella should take you as an example" she says.

"No ma, I am hoping they would return just like she is. I want to see his face. Hear his voice. Laugh with him. Cry on his shoulder. Lay in his arms. Kiss his cheek. At the same time I want to slap him and call him the worst thing that has ever happened in my life. Look him in the eye and tell him I don't love him anymore. I just want to let it all go, then why am I holding on to it? Mama it hurts and I just want the pain to stop" I say silently crying now.

"Oh baby girl" mama says and hold me tight. I hug her back as cry. "We will get through this" she cooks and I shake my head.

"Do you really believe that?" I ask and look at her. "Do you believe that I will get through this? Mom I have been alive for seventeen years and my first boyfriend was a freaking vampire. So in what natural world will I get through this?" I ask and she sighs.

"I don't know baby. I don't want to send you back to Africa like this. What will Mama says? I took my daughter to America and sent her back with a broken heart that can not be fixed?" She asks and I sigh.

"I don't want to stay here anymore mom, but I have a feeling that if I leave I will just go die back in Africa. He did this to me mom. He broke my heart, it's killing me slowly, he is making me feel this dreadful pain. The pain that makes me want to rip my heart out just to stop it from feeling" I say. "I don't want them to come back. I won't be able to forgive them mom, never in my life. I want them to stay where they are, away from me and my dying form" I says and get off the stool. I walk up the stairs and into my room where I fell a sleep for a hour or so.

♠♠♠♠
A/N: Hey guys.
Don't hate me, but honestly am I the only one they hates Jasper at this precise moment? Or any of the Cullens really? My baby girl is suffering. She really needs happiness in her life. Poor Sheila and Bella, but Bella has Jake so nah.
SEE Y'ALL IN THE NEXT CHAPTER...