Closet Case

Coming Out Part One

Michael^^^^^^^^^^

January 13,

Today marks one month of tutoring. I ant to talk to Dusty about how he does it. How he deals with the constant bullying and belittling. I am now like 75% sure I'm gay but I don't want to come out if I'm not. If I don't write tonight then I died or was killed.

James

I head over to his house after school since my parents are homophobic assholes. I knock and he lets me in. We work until his mom calls us down for dinner. I look at the clock and see it's been two hours.We sit at the table and eat some deer tacos. After dinner we head upstairs. When we get in his room and sit I ask

"How do you do it?" 

"Do what?"

"Let it all go. Not care about the bullying you get because you're gay." 

"I just don't care I think what I think about myself is more important now can you kinda go home so I can get some sleep?" 

"Oh uh... yeah" I say then exit. When I walk in my mom says "Hunny who's house have you been going to?"

"My tutors" "Oh Ok" she says then leaves.I walk upstairs and get in a shower then head to bed.

When I get to school Matt is waiting by my locker with Jakob and Dimitri. He say "How's tutoring been with the fag?"

"I hate it but I have to do it . Why? What are you planning?" 

"A little prank that will make him leave you alone for ever."

"What's that?"

"Kiss him and then let him fall for you before telling him you would never like some one like him"  "Damn that's cruel but might work."Then the damn bell rings and we head to class. All I can think about is if this plan is worth it.

When we get into Dusty's room after school I push him up against the wall and kiss him then once I realize what I had done I ran. That kiss confirmed it I'm gay. But now what the hell do I do.I head to Michael my brothers apartment He's in college and is 22. I pull into his "drive way" and park trying to calm my nerves. I go upstairs and knock on his door he opens it and smiles when he sees its me. He pulls me into a hug and starts walking inside and I follow. We sit on the couch and he says

"Hey bro what's up it's been forever?" I shift uncomfortably under his gaze  and twirl my thumbs. I keep my eys on the ground. He shifts closer wrapping his arm around my shoulders and says

"Hey bro what's wrong? It's me you can tell me anything"

I shift again then say "I need to t...t...tell you something." He nods telling me to go on "I'm g..g..g..g..a.. I'm gay." I say then flinch lookig down wrapping my arms around myself holding my torso ready for rejection. I have tears brimming in my eyes. He gently grabs my chin and makes me look at him. I see a look ofrespect on his face and I lose it I statr bawling sobbing out appologies burrying my face in his chest. He rubs my back as the door opens and a man steps in with a confused but jealous look on his face.

"Babe what's going on?" the man asks him

"I'll explain in a second can you give us a minute please?" he looks skeptical but nods then walks away. Michael pulls away and says

"Bro I don't care if you are gay. It's okay. Hell I'm gay. Why do you think I got out of thee as soon as I could? " I look at him and he smiles so I smile and hug him back.