instagram.

chapter 40.

~Naomi's POV~

"I don't know what to do, Renjun. It's hard enough now that I have to teach more classes and Naomi has school but being a father? What if I'm not ready? I don't want to let her down... no we haven't even talked about it like that... I'll support her regardless. I just don't know if we'll make that decision and then regret it? Okay, I'll talk to you later man. Thanks." I backed away from the closed door and scurried to the living room after hearing Lucas's conversation. I wasn't meant to hear it, I was going to get another blanket for us.

"Baby, I got the blanket! Anything else before I go back?"Lucas called out and I wiped the tears the unknowingly let out.

"No that's all!" I shout back and get comfortable on the couch once again. Lucas was stressing about this more than he was showing and it worries me. What if we keep the baby and he leaves me because it's too much for him?

"You okay?" He asks as he sits back down next to me, I smile the best I can and nod but I can't help but think about what he said to Renjun. It wouldn't be right to keep the baby if it'll make things worse right?

I thought about my options carefully as we watched the movie that I stopped paying attention to ages ago. After it ended, we had decided to go to sleep early, Lucas had a class in the morning.

~the next morning bc I'm drained~

(Once again. Warning. BIG WARNING. LIKE IF YOU GET TRIGGERED I WARNED YOU BC IM WRITING THIS NOW AND IM GETTING TRIGGERED)

"I'll be back in an hour! Remind me to buy more food for Tater Tot, I keep forgetting and she can't keep eating our food! Love you." Lucas smiled at me as he kissed my cheek but his smile didn't quite reach his eyes like usual. I watched him as he left and laid back, finally being able to cry without worrying Lucas.

My mind was racing with different outcomes based on what I could possibly do. Everything seemed like the wrong thing to do. I didn't want to ruin things when we were perfectly fine before all of this. At the same time, Lucas and I could be a family, would it be so bad? Plenty of people started young, right? I didn't want to talk about this with Lucas. He would feel guilty and worry too much.

"Mom?"

"Naomi? Is everything okay?"

"N-no mom, I need your help."

"Tell me what's wrong, baby."

"Mom I'm so sorry, God I'm so sorry mama."

"Don't apologize! Why are you apologizing?"

"Mama, I'm p-pregnant."

"..."

"Mama?"

"Lucas is the father right?"

"Of course he is!"

I could already hear her voice crack and it made my own heart break. I knew this wasn't what she wanted of me right now.

"Does he know? Have you told him?"

"He knows. We found out together."

"Are you guys going to keep the baby? Or have you decided—well, you know.."

"I don't know, I want to, maybe. I just don't know. I just wanted to tell you before I made a decision."