✖He's Not Mine [An Utterly Ridiculous Dramione Baby Story . . . Sort-of]

THREE

THE BOY WHO WAS DISTURBED AF

Harry had, out of habit, been looking at the Marauders Map. He'd woken from a nightmare and when he realised there was no Hermione to tell him all will be okay, he knew he'd never get back to sleep.

Since May 2nd, Hermione had slept in the same room as Ron and Harry in the Burrow. None of the three could sleep without waking from terrible nightmares, but once they'd seen that both their friends were still safely tucked away, they'd easily go back to bed. Sometimes, their screaming in sleep woke one of the other two up. It was usually Hermione, and she was rather good at getting them back into peaceful slumber. Ron wondered if she was quietly slipping them dreamless sleep potions.

It was on this night when Harry found his eyes drawn to Hermione's name. He'd found it amusing, her colourful language in the Potions classroom. It was new to her. But unfortunately, she'd gotten detention for it. It was nine thirty when he noticed something strange.

Hermione was pacing the classroom, but Snape's banner was right beside hers.

What on earth was going on?

After some time, she stopped moving and Draco's banner approached her. Snape's banner then clung to Draco's.

By five minutes past ten, the three banners were moving towards the Hospital Wing.

Harry stared harder as if that might allow him to see or hear what was going on. Then the three banners left.

Once again, Snape's banner was passed from Hermione's to Draco's. They were in McGonagall's office . . . and then they vanished!

Harry snuck out of the common room and sprinted. He tried every combination of words he could until by chance, he got the password. He sprinted up the stairs.

"Professor! Professor McGonagall!"

"What is it, Mr Potter?" McGonagall shouted when he barreled into her office.

"What's happened to Hermione?"

"Nothing."

"Then, has something happened to Malfoy?"

"Why on earth would you think something's happened?"

Harry hesitated. "Er . . ."

He was saved from answering when the fireplace burned green. They heard Draco before they saw anyone.

"You absolute arse, Hermione Granger!"

"Mind your language, you bastard!"

"Excuse me?!"

The brunette witch and the blonde wizard both sort of stumbled from the fireplace. "You could've killed us!" Draco cried.

"It would've been better than you waking the dead at St Mungo's with your horrid shrieking!" Hermione cried back.

It appeared that neither student noticed McGonagall and Harry. Perhaps they assumed the professor would have retired to bed.

"I stand by my arguments," Draco yelled, stepping closer to Hermione and towering threateningly over her. "I refuse to hand him over to some strangers!"

"Are you going look after him then?"

Draco suddenly snatched a bundle from Hermione. "Maybe I will, modblood!"

Harry didn't dare intervene. Hermione wasn't thirteen anymore, she was perfectly capable of fighting Draco herself. Aside from that, Hermione looked furious and it terrified him.

"Would you be careful?!" she shrieked. "He's not a bag!"

"I'm not giving him to strangers! I refuse! You can't make me!"

"I'm not say we should give him to strangers! I'm just saying you can't look after him!"

"Oh, and I assume you can?" Draco sneered, leering down at Hermione.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Well, I'm more capable than you, seeing as I know not to grab a baby so roughly!" As she spoke, her voice slowly rose in pitch until she was once again shrieking at Draco.

Before Draco could say anything, the bundle in his arms began to cry. Hermione's anger and frustration dissipated. "You scared him awake," she said softly.

"ME?!" Draco cried incredulously. "You were the one --"

"Oh, shut up or he won't. Here," she added, holding out her hands. Arguing seemed to have given her more confidence, because she swiftly grabbed the baby from Draco and began rocking him, her earlier fear of breaking his neck unheard of.

As soon as he was in Hermione's arms, the baby quieted slightly.

"Miss Granger, Mr Malfoy, I would appreciate if you'd keep your voices down next time you enter my office."

The two students snapped twin gazes of shock to the professor, which then turned to mortified looks when they realised the thoughts that must be flowing through the mind of a stunned Harry Potter.

"He's not mine!" they both yelled, causing the baby to start crying again. Passing him back to Draco only made him wail louder, so much so that Draco shoved him back at Hermione.

It appeared that he was only content being in Hermione's arms and watching Draco, which meant that Draco had to stand behind Hermione and pay attention to him.

Harry's expression twisted. "What in Merlin's name . . . ?"

Draco continued whispering random phrases and words to the baby while Hermione looked at her best friend.

"Remember in Potions? Lavender and I spilled the ruined potion and professor Snape stepped in it? Well, during detention . . ." She shrugged and glanced at the baby in her arms.

When she spoke again, she spoke to both Harry and McGonagall. "St Mungo's said the best they can do is stop the de-ageing process. There's no spell or potion that can instantly return him to his natural age. They said the safest would be to let him naturally age, but we could feed him an ageing potion daily which would take roughly a year to return him to thirty-eight. Although that's risky, because they have no idea what will happen if he misses a dose."

Harry had to sit down to take in all the information. Professor McGonagall nodded, understanding what they had been arguing about.

"Well, seeing as this incident is through the fault of you two, the two of you will be responsible for him. I suggest you make your decision before morning, because some explaining is going to need to be done."

Draco looked up sharply. "What do you mean?"

McGonagall shrugged. "I simply mean that the decision lies with the two of you. If you feel that Miss Brown is to blame as well, then you must seek her input as well. Consult whomever you wish, but the fate of Severus Snape lies in your hands."

Draco and Hermione shared a glance. "Merlin's soggy --"

"Language, mudblood."

"Piss off, arsehole."