Punctuation

Another Dream

I stared into their eyes.
Let me buy you dinner.
They stared back at me.
The menus had just been taken by our waitress, we had just finished giggling over our orders.
He laughed at me, she laughed at me.
I laughed with them, but suddenly nothing was funny.
So I cleared my throat.
How come whenever we're going out to dinner together, there's always something wrong? She asked, looking down at her thumb nail and then returning her gaze to me sullenly.
He sat there with a lump in his throat as I stared down at my hands, as if suddenly they were interesting. I twiddled the ring around my finger, cleared my throat again, sat forward, leaning into the table.
It was loud, but I ordered them to sit across from me despite our normal arrangement.
I looked them in their eyes and I opened my mouth to let the words fry our conversation in disbelief.
I am terminal.
Their smiles were never there to begin with, but whatever light that was left behind their eyes disappeared then also.
She was silent for a long time, staring at me with her mouth wide open.
He tried to form words, but his hand clasped over his mouth and he sat so still I thought he might have passed out.
He closed his eyes.
He must have prayed I was joking.
I met his eyes again, swimming in their confusion and anger and sadness.
How long? He asked.
A little over a year. I replied, sipping from my straw.
I can't... she started.
I have come to terms with it...now I know I can't waste time. I know I need to make the most out of every minute.
What is going to happen? How is it going to happen? When? Why? He asked, tears brimming his eyes. I looked away, I couldn't stand to see him cry.
I'm going to lose my vision, then my ability to walk, then eventually my ability to talk and understand and it's going to get to the point where my brain completely shuts off. There's nothing they can do.
She looked at me, her eyes so distant and her mouth clenched tightly together.
He reached out and took my hand. I wished they would have abandoned me there, walked out of the restaurant because they couldn't handle any more hurt.
But they didn't...and they wouldn't...and I knew that better than anyone would. They were not the type of people to shy away from someone they loved.
Don't leave us. He said.
She nodded her head in agreement, reaching out for my other hand.
I was too tired to cry. I was too over it to feel the exhaustion.
I squeezed their hands
And I woke up.