Depressed Magcon Imagines

Matt

Matt, your boyfriend of six months, had went to the store and you were home alone. You were sitting in the silence , and when all is quiet, your mind screams the loudest. You had been suffering from depression for a while, and Matt knew that. He had been doing his best to make you feel loved for the past six months. You were trying to stay strong, but it was moments like this when it became hard. You walked to the bedroom and saw your reflection in the mirror. You stopped there, completely disgusted with your appearance. You grabbed at the skin on your stomach, and ran your hands over your hips. You hated the way you looked. You felt hot tears running down you cheeks. You focused on every part of your face, and you couldn't find one thing you liked. It was all too much for you to handle and you started sobbing.

You ran into the bathroom and went into the cabinets. You hid a blade in the corner of one a while ago, but you hadn't used it since Matt and you started dating. You grasped the cool metal, and kicked off your shorts. You started digging into your thighs. Each cut you made was deeper than the last. You watched as the blood ran all along your legs and dripped onto the bathroom floor. A kind of euphoria washed over you. Each slice released more pressure, more feelings. You loved the way your skin stung when you started to get deeper, or when you cut in the same spot twice. You were still sobbing, mostly because you felt lost and out of control. You loved the way it felt when you cut, but you hated the way you loved it.

Matt walked into the bathroom and dropped everything in his hands. He ran to your side and pulled the blade out of your hand. He threw it in the garbage and pulled you into him. He didn't care that you were getting blood all over his clothes, or that you were crying into his chest. All he cared about was comforting you. You were practically screaming as you sobbed into his chest. He rubbed your back and held onto you tightly, making you feel safe. You calmed down and he pulled you back so he could look at you. You noticed that tears were running down his face.

"Why, (y/n), why? I try so hard to make you happy, all I want is for you to feel loved. I can't believe I'm such a failure. I just want you to get better. God, I hate myself! What do I need to do, (y/n)?! Baby, I love you so much. I never ever want to see you like this again," Matt choked out.

His words impacted you so much. You never realized that by hurting yourself, you could be hurting him. You couldn't believe you were watching the love of your life cry, knowing that you were the reason for his tears. You had no idea that he felt the way he did. You didn't know how much responsibility he took for helping you get better. You didn't know how to handle the fact that he was blaming himself for something that you did to yourself.

"Oh my God, Matt. You are not a failure at all. I love you so much. You are the only reason I am still breathing. If I didn't have you, I don't know what I would do. You can't blame yourself for something I did. I'm so sorry I disappointed you. Baby, believe me when I say you are perfect. Just by being you, you are helping me get better. I promise I am going to try my hardest to get better. Thank you for always being here. I love you so so much. "

"You are so amazing, (y/n). I'm going to be here for you forever and always. You mean the world to me. I love you more than I thought I could ever love someone. You are my everything."

He leaned down and kissed you. He cupped his hands around your face as he passionately kissed you. You kissed back and the feeling of his lips on yours was more intense and wonderful than anything you had ever felt before. He pulled away before you guys got too far and picked you up. He sat you on the bathroom counter and started cleaning your legs up. After he was done wiping away all the blood, he kissed all of your cuts. You felt so loved. He put bandages on your cuts, and then picked you up again. He placed you on the bed and started kissing you again. You made out for a really long time, and then cuddled the rest of the night. You fell asleep in his arms and had the sweetest sleep.