Chapter 44

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I had no intention of spending the night with Jared, but couldn't stop my lips from curling into a smile when I noticed his discarded tee lying on the floor. I took my dress off and pulled it over my head. Gripping the collar, I held the soft cotton fabric up to my nose and inhaled. I closed my eyes, enjoying the familiar scent.

Opening my eyes, I gasped at my reflection in the mirror. Jared did quite a number on my poor neck and chest, a retaliation of sorts for the way I purposely marked his skin the last time. The way I figured it, any other women he may be seeing would certainly take notice of what I had done to him. "You've made a mess of my dress, so I'm staying here tonight. Are you going to take me to your bedroom, or do you plan to sit there naked all night?"

I watched as he slid his tongue over the front of his teeth, and became entranced by the faint curve of his perfect lips. "Does this mean I get to snuggle you?" When I rolled my eyes and shrugged, he took a deep breath and stood up, bawling his pajama pants in his hand. He wasn't the least bit shy as he moved toward me, taking my hand and leading the way upstairs.

Silence was a cruelty I purposely inflicted. I wanted him to know what it felt like to be used. He pulled the duvet back and slipped between the crisp sheets and I did the same, only I faced away from him. I grinned when he inched closer, draping an arm around me. I lay there wide awake, listening to his soft breathing until I finally fell asleep.

Before the day had started for most people, I was up and making the drive back to Calabasas. Wearing an old, faded pair of sweats I found folded up on his dresser, I crept out before he woke up.

I had to get home so that I could try and relax for a while before my lunch with Luke. He asked me yesterday if I wanted to join him and Leila at his favorite restaurant, and I said yes. I could literally kick myself in the ass for it now, but still, I couldn't bring myself to cancel.

I parked my car and darted up the stairs and unlocked the front door. Walking inside, I made my way down the hallway, glancing with disgust at the door to the guest room that I wished would somehow implode.

I entered my room and dropped face down on the mattress. Lying there, I played candy crush until exhaustion finally won out.

Six hours later, I was seated at a table in a very fancy restaurant, squirming as Luke silently evaluated my neck. Well, so much for my ridiculous efforts to cover it with makeup. "I'm seriously dying to know who decorated your neck."

"I'm so jealous." Leila added with a wink. She had always been the most spunky woman I've ever met. "I wish your father was still alive, Luke."

Taking a sip of his lemonade, Luke nudged me with his elbow. "But they didn't do that sort of thing back in your day, right mom?"

She squinted at him, pointing her finger as if he insulted her. "How do you think you came to be?" I loved Leila's sense of humor and bluntness. She had this way of offending and embarrassing her son without even trying.

The waiter came to take our order. "I think I'm going with the pasta. How about you guys?" I stared at the menu. My mouth was practically salivating, I was so hungry. Luke chose fish and Leila went with grilled chicken.

"My guess.." he looked at Leila, "is that Jared Leto did that to her. I do believe he had similar marks all over his neck the last time I saw him." He gave me a wink. "Am I right?"

"Now there is a handsome man, although I do prefer him with shorter hair. I watched on television when he won that Oscar and oh, he has the most handsome face. Is that who you're seeing dear?"

"It's not serious." I insisted, watching Luke almost spit his water out laughing. "Really?" I asked, rolling my eyes at him.

"I knew I was right." He leaned back in his chair, shaking his head, pleased with himself for thoroughly embarrassing me.
"I'd hate to see what it looks like when it is serious. Have you seen that in the mirror? It looks like you have some kind of disease."

"Son, he's just feisty and there's nothing wrong with that. I'd love for you to find someone like our Jennifer here. Sweetheart, don't you have any available friends?" Her southern accent always made me smile.

Before I could answer her, Luke folded his arms. "Oh no, I don't want any of her friends. Jared had sex with your best friend, or have you forgotten all about that?" As the words left his mouth, my heart clenched. It's hard not to take offense when Jared's mistake was constantly being thrown back in my face.

"What?" Leila clutched her pearls and stared from her son, back to me.

"Can we please not?" I just didn't want to do this in a restaurant full of people. "Not here."

"You're right, this isn't the time or the place. You already know how I feel about this situation. You're a grown woman and can make decisions for yourself. I just wanted to take my two favorite girls to lunch and have a nice time, not argue over this egomaniac. Let's talk about something else."

"Fine." I huffed.

The food finally made its way to the table and we ate, talking about random subjects. On the way outside, Luke turned to face me. "I'm seeing Veronica tonight."

I looked at my watch and beamed with a smile. "I've got a date too, his name is Mike."

Luke stopped walking. "Wait, you just said that you were with Jared and now you have a date with some guy named Mike? Care to explain?"

"No, there's nothing to explain really." I grinned and Leila stepped closer.

"That's it honey, play the field. They always seem to take notice once you no longer care." She pulled me closer, hugging me tight.

"That's enough bad advice, mother." He leaned in and whispered. "Call me if you need me and if I don't hear from you, I'll see you in the morning. Have a good time with.. Mike."

I ran a few errands and made it back home with enough time to catch up with my mom on the phone while doing my laundry. I missed her and was dying for the holidays to arrive so I could visit. After chatting for over an hour, I had to get ready to go out.

I picked out the outfit that I planned to wear and laid it across the bed. Mike and I met a few days after returning from London. He was a singer in a local band and seemed really nice.

I straightened my hair and was sitting on the couch, watching the news when he arrived. Opening the door, I was not expecting to see Jared standing there. "What are you doing here?" I asked, shooting him a confused look, but backing up so that he could step inside.

"I thought maybe we could have dinner." He looked down at what I was wearing and suddenly realized that I already had plans. "You going out?"

Just as the words left his mouth, Mike appeared in the doorway. Jared's eyes awkwardly traveled from Mike and back to me. "What the fuck is this? Can I speak to you alone, please?"

"Oh shit! You are one of my favorite singers, man!" Mike stepped closer to Jared, holding his hand out to shake. Jared completely ignored him and glared at me angrily.

"Excuse us." I sighed. Jared followed me into the kitchen and furiously cornered me. "What's going on? I thought we were fine."

"We are fine." I stared at him.

"So, if we're fine, why the hell are you going on a date with another guy? I don't get it, you were in my bed last night, right?"

"Yes, I was, but that was just sex. We aren't a couple, Jared. I thought you understood that." I moved around him, pacing back and forth. "This is what you wanted, right? Just sex.. the ability to fuck my best friend as well as me. I'm fine with it, so there shouldn't be an issue with me fucking you last night and Mike tonight." 

His mouth hung open as he listened to my words. "That's what you want, to fuck him?"

"Yes. That's what I want." I answered.

"Fine, I'm done with you." He stormed out, bumping into Mike on the way out the door.

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