There was a faint knock on the door. You sat on the corner of the strange bed, unmoving. You stared at the porcelain white curtains, fluttering in the light May wind. Sometimes you would sit in that position for hours, unaware of the environment around you, ignoring any pain or hunger. You were sure you had lost weight. You chuckled, remembering how you wanted to lose weight for him.
Him, the thought of his image made you cry silently. It's been months since you've last seen him. After he threw you out and fired you, Chaeyoung was nice enough to take you in. Her apartment was small, but you were thankful for the shelter. Originally, you had only planned on staying here for a few days, but things were more bigger than you had anticipated. Namjoon cleared out your office and burned all of your designs. He forbid people from speaking your name. Chaeyoung had to hide the fact that you're living with her because she could get fired.
As for Hoseok, he left RKive and moved to SM. The guys occasionally sent you messages to cheer you up, they all said they believe you. But no one can convince Namjoon once he's determined. That was one of the traits you love about him. Well, loved. In your heart, you knew you love him. The feeling was so strong, it was undeniable. Being away from him was painful, you had shut everything and everyone out. Most days, you would stay in the room. You haven't been outside for so long. There was no point anymore.
The knock was a little louder this time. "Come in." you said in a weak voice.
Chaeyoung entered with a sympathetic smile. "Hey, how are you doing?" She asked this everyday, and every time, you would answer:
"I'm okay."
"It's my day off, why don't we go out for a walk?" she asked. Maybe it was her smile, maybe it was the breeze coming from outside, or your own heart wanting a change in scenery. You nodded. Chaeyoung was thrown off by your answer, she was expecting you to say no like always. You got up to get dressed, and joined her outside. The warm air hugged your body as you exited. The bright sun overhead shined down on you, chasing out the dark clouds that had been there since that night. Chaeyoung grabbed your hand and walked down the street.
"Where are we going?" you asked, not particularly caring about the destination, you figured you should say something to her.
"There's a cute flower shop that just opened up. I thought we could check it out." she answered cheerfully. You hummed. She started talking about work, but she avoided any mention of him. It must be hard for her. You have thought about moving in with Kyungsoo, but he's going through some rough time with SM right now and you didn't want to add to his trouble. But eventually you'll have to tell him. What would he say? Would he be mad at Namjoon? Or at you for being so stupid?
You knew the shop was close because you could smell the floral scent from where you were standing. The outside was decorated like a garden. You stared at the scene while remembering a memory. It was just after you two started dating, it had snowed hard. And you suggested that when spring comes, you guys should plant a tree together. It'll grow like your relationship. That was just a distant dream now, shattered and scattered in the past.
"Y/N, are you alright?" Chaeyoung asked beside you. You snapped out of the memory, a single tear fell down your cheek. You wiped it away before she could notice.
"Yeah. I'm just really excited to be outside." you lied. She didn't seem to buy it, but dragged you inside anyways. The doorbell ringed. The shopkeeper greeted the both of you. Chaeyoung was looking around like a kid at a candy store. She would point out little plants in little pots. She bought a few stationary plants for the house. You past by a pot in the shape of a koala. You thought about buying it for him, but he would probably throw it away. He had probably threw everything of you out of his memories. Your relationship wasn't long, but it was meaningful to you. You'll never forget him.
When the two of you got home, Chaeyoung ran in her room and ran back out to the living room, an envelope in her hand. "Here, Jimin gave this to me before the boss could find out." She handed you a large white envelope. It was addressed to you, and the address of RKive. You were thankful to have Jimin by your side. It was from the Milan school you applied to months ago. Your hands shaking as you tore the top open. The content contained a letter and a booklet. You read the official letter and sank into the couch, tears filling your vision.
***
"I can't believe you're really going to Italy." said Jennie.
"I know, it's all thanks to you." you answered. The boys and girls had gathered at the airport to bid you farewell. After receiving the acceptance letter, you wanted to call Namjoon to tell him, but decided against it. You called Jennie instead, who then told everyone else. You didn't realize your close friendships with them until now. They had always supported you and made you laugh. You'll miss them.
"I'll miss you, unnie." Chaeyoung said, giving you a tight hug.
"I won't be gone forever, silly. I promise to call you every night." you said, pinching her cheeks.
"Take care of yourself, noona." Jungkook said.
"We'll come visit on our tour." Lisa added.
"Remember to eat properly. If you ever need a recipe, you know who to call." said Jisoo. You gave her a nod. She became your second mom. Speaking of which, when you told your mom and Kyungsoo of your acceptance, they were extremely proud of you. But also nervous since you'll be in a foreign country. You said you needed to escape, and they understood.
"If you feel weird, it's okay to come back." Yoongi said, putting a hand on your shoulder.
"No, oppa. I can't come back. You know it. I won't come back until I get what I want." He grinned and gave you a soft hug. Even though he wasn't one for physical contact, he was sad to see you go.
"Do you have everything?" Seokjin asked. You checked for your ticket and passport.
"Yes. I have to go now." you told them. There was another round of hugs, and a little bit of crying from Chaeyoung. You promised to not turn around as you entered the gate. You were leaving the pain away, to chase the happiness that you deserve.
Goodbye, Namjoon.
YOU ARE READING
her (Kim Namjoon x Reader)
Fanfiction"Well Miss Doh, it seems that he likes you, which is rare. How about this, how would you like to become his full-time nanny?" "Excuse me?" "I'll pay you double whatever your work is paying you right now. And I'll need you to move into my house immed...
