The Boy With The Blank Stare: The Promise

Chapter One: Is it possible?

I could hear my voice cracking as I begged "w-what..d-do...I...do?"

"I don't know..." Saihara answered after a long pause. My eyes widened as he sighed "I don't know...if you can ever truly move on from losing someone..." he admitted. Huh...? I felt my eyes widen at this statement. If it's true what he is saying then...

Am I going to hate myself for living the rest of my life?

"I lost my Mom the same day you lost your friends...and even though it's been years...I still miss her...but" he started. I could his voice, it was severely unconfident and seemed sad, yet he just continued to tell me this.

"I am not going to ever forget her, even if it hurts to remember things that hurt or damage you...it's not ever going to go away...but" Saihara squeezed my hand in assurance.

"It's still possible to move forward with those memories...so, why don't we move forward together?" He asked and my eyes widened. Together...?

'You mean it?' I asked, "of course...heh...after all...we can't change what happened...and we will never be able to forget those people...but..." Saihara took a deep breath.

"We can move forward...it might take a long time...but I'll stand by your side Ouma, I promised to you remember?" I felt my eyes widening from this, he actually wants to stay...even though he knows I used to be a brat...and still am...yet...

'I promise, after all its thanks to you I have a dream again!'

Chi...I couldn't keep our promise could we...? But...here is it is again. Another promise...so if you're not haunting me and cursing me...could you maybe help this one come true?

'What about everyone else?' I asked and Saihara just paused for a bit "others, and that includes me, can't fix you...I mean I hope I am helping but...it's really up to you Ouma" Saihara admitted.

I was expecting that...but...

'Then I'll promise something to' I told him 'I promise to try and to trust you...besides Momota you are one of the only people to ever really help me before' I restarted.

'So I'll try and be a good friend to you to' I promised "great then let's shake on it" Saihara said grabbing my hand and we shook on it sealing our promise.

"Oh shoot we are going to be late," Saihara said terrified and I shrugged, 'I don't care I don't really even pay attention, I just listen to my-' I started when all of a sudden I remembered Akamatsu had my headphones.

'Saihara, Akamatsu stole my headphones can you get them back?' I asked and I heard a sigh "seriously? She stole your headphones...yeah I'll get them don't worry" he assured as he grabbed the handles and began running.

"Hold on! I am not going to get detention!" He screamed as I laughed to myself about his reaction to being late.

Heh...he's nothing like her at all...if this was me and Chiasa we would have just walked normally still and just deal with detention by playing with the chessboard Ms. Jin has in there...no wonder I never noticed anything similar about them...I never would have guessed...

I wonder if they look similar. I wish I could see what your face really looks like Saihara...

Chi...I hope you get he's not replacing you...you're still my best friend...heh...still...is it really possible? Being able to finally stop crying or having panic attacks by our last day together? Remembering what that man did to you and the rest...how everything was my fault...

Or to be able to talk about you without being shushed up...or fearing that whoever does know will get hurt like them.

I wonder...if they have even forgiven me...their parents...everyone at school...they think I burned down the old school...that I convinced them to commit suicide...and that we in the process we killed the substitute.

I can still remember his face...that scar...his laugh...why was his face the last thing I had to ever see? I won't ever even be able to see Saihara's face..or know what he looks like...he took that away from me, he took everything away from me.

I never really thought about that before...I remember everyone else faces from before I went blind...but him...I never met him...and I'll never know...wonder if he really is emo.

"Agh! The elevator is still broken" Saihara cursed and I chuckled as he had to take his time to get us up the stairs, "heh... you're heavy...what is this chair made of titanium?" He asked sarcastically. I grinned at this.

Is it possible...?

"Phew...DARN IT! THIS IS ONLY THE THIRD FLOOR?" Saihara cursed moving forward. Flinging open a door.

That I...

"Heh...heh...were dead meat..." Saihara panted.

Actually can...and deserve...

To be happy?

If...if I can truly be happy again...is that ok?

"Ok, we're just going to pretend we aren't twenty minutes late ok?" Saihara told me. I nodded as he opened the door, I could tell he was severely tired. He pushed me in as I felt something inside of me let go of something.

I don't know what it was but...I felt lighter none the less.