Darkside (Steve McGarrett Fanfiction)

Chapter 19

I lay in bed high out of my mind, I've been avoiding Steve and Danny since they charged Chris and booked him with for rape and domestic violence. I checked into a hotel in Honolulu mostly because I know Steve and Danny are going to go check my house and I want to be left alone right now. 

Rick and Morty plays through my mac as I laugh at how crazy and unpredictable Rick is kinda like Steve. Sitting up I reach for my bong packing a medium size bowl lighting it before inhaling the smoke. There's a knock at the door as I exhale into the filter, "Housekeeping" a voice yells through the door. 

Walking over to the door I open it to reveal Steve and Danny who walk past me into the room. "please come right in." I say closing the door with sarcasm. "What did you expect us to do Lynn? You run away rather than facing things" Danny says causing me to giggle. "Why are you laughing this isn't funny" Danny says as Steve steps in front of me looking at my eyes. "that's because she's high right now," Steve says as I touch my nose smiling. "Bingo" I say as I lay down on my bed. 

I look at Steve and Danny who are watching me, "So I was about to order food do you guys want anything on me?" I offer. "Um sure," Steve says coming over and sitting next to me, "Where is it?' Danny asks I point to the floor. "Come on Danny, really your gonna do this now?" Steve asks, "Do what take the drugs away from my little sister? Yes, Steve, that's exactly what I'm going to do as an officer of the law." he replies being Danny. 

"Danny she's trying to cope with everything going on in her life," Steve says as I rest my head on his chest. "Steve this isn't the way to do it," Danny replies with a sigh putting down my grinder and bong. Danny sits on the bed watching me, "Lynn can I ask you something? Danny asks. "Sure," I reply looking back at him pausing Rick and Morty. "Have you done anything other than weed?" he asks causing me to sit up followed by Steve. "Hear me out, the other reason I left Chris was because I caught him lace one of my bowls with coke," I reply. Danny shakes his head, "That's why I moved out to LA it was legalized there and work was easy to find." I reply. 

"Why didn't you call me?" Danny asks, "You were smack dab in the middle of your divorce." I reply Danny gives me a look that look he dishes when he's upset. "Can you knock it off, you're being the biggest buzz kill." I snap feeling judged. "That's right LYNN I AM A BUZZKILL. It's my job to take drugs away." He yells standing up crossing his arms. 

"IF YOU HADN'T DISTRACTED ME FROM THE STUDIO MY TRACK WOULDVE BEEN BETTER. IT COULD'VE BEEN NUMBER 1 AND YOU RUINED IT!"  Chris yells in my face as he bashes my head against the counter sending me to the floor. "Stop. please Chris" I whimper as his shoe collides with my face. 

My arms are wrapped around my body as I shake. It's as if my body has forgotten how to breathe and the only thing I can think is I'm going to die. "Lynn you need to breathe." Steve's voice is distant as I relive the memories of living with Chris. After what feels like hours, my breathing slows down and the shaking stops. 

"Are you okay?" Steve asks rubbing my back, I nod still in the fetal position. "I'm sorry." I whisper as I start to cry into my knees. Arms wrap around me holding me, "It's okay, just breath with me okay? Inhale ......Exhale.....Inhale...... and slowly exhale. good job." Steve says as I focus on my breathing. I close my eyes until I'm calm again. 

"Danny, yelling isn't always the solution." Steve says, "I don't always yell" Danny retorts. "Shut Up Please both of you." I finally say Danny looks at me in shock as Steve lets go of me. We stay in silence for a couple of moments while I continue to take deep breathes. 

"I was diagnosed with Anxiety, panic disorder and PTSD from Chris. It took me years to condition my body to stop flinching and settle my panic attacks and then-" My voice cracks. "I have a prescription for medical marijuana," I reply. "So that's why you turned down the job," Steve says understanding. "You turned down the job?" Danny asks looking at me, I bite my lip looking away. "I can't even defend myself from Chris how am I suppose to have your back when I can't even have my own?" I say looking back to them. 

"Look Lynn if that was the issue I can train you," Steve says causing Danny to laugh. "I understand why you turned down the job now, " Danny says making me chuckle. "What's that suppose to mean?" Steve asks turning to my brother, "What I mean is that you are an animal and I don't even wanna know how you work out. Probably lift cars or something." Danny says making me laugh again. 

My brother is the most sarcastic sassy person I know, "Look I appreciate what you're both trying to do, but I can't." I reply. "Why can't you Lynn? You were one of the best in the Navy, what happened? Why won't you just let us help?" Steve asks standing up next to Danny. I get up as well,  "Because you can't help me. Not from my worst enemy." I reply. "Are you talking about Wo Fat because as I told you we will catch him," Steve says getting mad. I shake my head, "I'm my own worst enemy." I tell him. "What the Hell are you talking about?" Danny asks I sit down putting my face in my hair in frustration. 

I sigh, "I'm not okay, I'm so far away from okay. I'm so confused as to what to think and feel about being the result a rape. It disgusts me," I pause physically cringing as tears begin to well up in my eyes. "And Chris brought back everything." I add as the tears spill from my eyes streaming down my face.