"Today, however can change things for better or worse. The outcome depends on you."
When a marriage fails the residue trickles down to everyone in the family. Sixteen-year-old Daya Nicole Johnston must fight to understand what is happening in her li...
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Day Two-December 4, Tuesday
Dear dad, I don't know how to feel about you. I want to hate you, fear you, maybe even deny you. You told me who you were; mom told me who you are, and I didn't believe it. I could not believe it. I wanted severely to disregard the voices being issued into my ears. To believe that what you did was an enormous misunderstanding and that everything could be repaired, but maybe it can't. Maybe it is just a childish wish. I saw you with my own eyes, my father. I watched in fear; I sat like a coward.... like you. I guess it is a family trait, a mass of cowards throughout our violent lineage. A cycle of disappointment and hurt.
The night and yesterday are behind me and my eyes are now directed onto today. I insist that today will be better, it has to be. I have to take things one day at a time and be patient with my situation and myself. "Dinnnnggg," Jay's alarm yelled at us, causing him to jump almost five feet in the air.
"Good morning sleepy head," I spoke as I ran my fingers through his wavy, brown locks. "Hey, did you sleep okay," he questioned while he rubbed his eyes, to which I replied with, "It was better with you here. Besides the snoring, I didn't miss that."
A slight laugh fell out of my mouth as he sat up in his bed and stroked his fingers through his hair. "I'm going to take a shower. Do me a favor and don't mess up my room."
I accepted his demand even though I'm sure that's impossible.
"Don't worry, I don't think it can get much worse."
A few minutes later, he was tucked, safely away in his bathroom as I comprehend my surroundings and grasp how I ended up here. I thought back on the events of yesterday, I relived every agonizing detail. I took close attention to my conversation with my dad and the moment he... he. I looked down at my hands and took notice of the fact that I was shaking fiercely. I threw those thoughts out of my mind and put my attention onto getting dressed, eating, and my normal morning routine.
My eyes surveyed his room, looking for my bag with a change of clothes inside, and then I realize where it was, Jay's bathroom. I mean I could wait, but I really needed to get dressed. I headed over to his bathroom, I stopped at the door, and heard him singing, "Party in the USA," and I took a mental note to tease him about it later.
"Jay, I'm coming in to get my bag," I said as I opened the door, and hear him say, "Don't peak at me." I quickly go in and out, being sure to grab my bag in the process.
"I promise I didn't see anything."
About 20 minutes in the future, Jay and I ate our cereal and headed towards the basement stairs to go to school.School hasn't been first-rate to me as of recently but dealing with the trauma of my household opposed to school is nowhere equal in weight.
When he walked back in the room, he went over to his mini fridge and made cereal for us to eat. He brought it over for us to eat on the bed.
"Do you remember what you said last night?" I nonchalantly asked trying not to scare him from the conversation.
