Black Leather and White Fur (Chat Noir X Reader)

Ch 49

Ah, what a beautiful day to go and get ice cream. Late afternoon light filtered through the clouds as the five... Six of us strolled down the streets Paris.

It was a warm evening and I decided to wear a light long-sleeved sweater. I had the sleeves bunched up around my forearms comfortably. I had felt more up beat this morning, so I decided to make myself actually presentable.

But I wasn't above comfort. My hair in a loose braid (you know, if it's long enough to do that) hung down my back, and my favorite comfy jeans adorned my legs.

We laughed and joked as we walked along the street, probably disturbing the other pedestrians. They great thing about it was that we didn't care! We felt alive and free!

Trenton held Marinette close by the waist as we walked. It made my insides ache a bit involuntarily, but I pushed it aside. I didn't like him any more. My heart just wishes it were in the same situation. To have someone.

Nino and Alya were being cute and nudging each other teasingly. I couldn't help but smile at them. They laughed the loudest and were the happiest beings on the planet it seemed like.

Next was me and Adrien. We walked side by side for a while, not touching until he threw an arm around my shoulders to show me something. He didn't remove it afterwards, not that I minded, of course.

There was a bit of silence between us when out of the blue he complemented me, "you look really cute in sweaters, (y/n)."

It took me half a second to process what he said, and when he did I felt a blush rise in my cheeks. "Oh, um- uh thanks!" I looked up at him and smiled. "Your new hairstyle doesn't look too bad yourself."

He had gone with a messier look today. He had some gel finger combed through his hair, holding some pieces off his forehead more than others. It looked good. Downright attractive.

The moment didn't last long as we approached our ride.

It didn't totally register where we were going, until we were almost to our mode of transportation. Well, more like how far. We were approaching the Metro station when I realized we were getting on it.

I slowed to a stop. To be honest, I haven't stepped foot in any one of their stations since the tragedy. And I sure as heck wasn't doing that today.

The now familiar feeling of fear arose in my chest as I stared at the tunnel in front of me. I grabbed at the railing, but when I did I wasn't with my friends.

There was a moment of silence before high pitched shrieks echoed into my skull. My shoulder was bumped repeatedly by people running away...

No.

I was pulled from my trance by Adrien shaking my shoulder. "Hey, what's up? You just zoned out for a bit." I just looked into his face with wide eyes.

Looking away, I forced out a laugh, trying to buy some time for me to make an excuse. The metro is really the only rational transport to get to the shop we were going to so suggesting something different was out the window.

That left me with pretty much one option on my mind -- leaving.

"Oh, yeah!" I shook my head dismissively, "I just forgot that I had to..." I blanked, where was I going with this explanation? "Grab some stuff out of the freezer for my mom."

That was a total and utter lie. My mom was out of town working, and the most we needed out of the freezer at the moment was lunch meat.

Before anyone questioned me I walked away quickly. The knot in my stomach unraveling with each step I took.

I turned with a last farewell, "you guys go on without me! See you tomorrow!"

I started to jog away before they called back to me and I felt lighter the farther I went.

When I got back to my house, my dad was online and not paying attention to me. I went to the freezer and pulled out a container of cool whip and stuck it in the fridge for an alibi, just in case.

For the rest for the evening I sat in my room, doing random things. I didn't allow my thoughts to torment me for a while, but nothing lasts forever.

Creeping thoughts of guilt weaseled their way into the for front of my mind.

You are so selfish to just leave them like that.

You didn't even tell them the real reason why.

Are they really your friends if you don't trust them with the truth?

So rude to interrupt the happy day.

What are you doing?

What am I doing? I started to curl up into a corner on my bed. The pillows and blankets  surrounded me and provided a little comfort.

Kama came and floated over to me knee, sitting on top of it. She didn't speak, but she gave me a look as if to say, 'are you okay?'

I simply shook my head after a moment of hesitation. I didn't know how to fix it though, I had a feeling that she didn't either.

She probably had an idea, but I had to do it myself, she couldn't do it for me. She only could support me along the way.

More thoughts pried their way into my consciousness.

You are such a liar, who would support a liar?

Who would want to love a selfish, rude, ugly human being like you?

You can't even deal with your own problems, you are such a burden to everyone else.

Unstable,

  boring,

    unstylish,

      useless,

         Jealous,

Who would love you?
  

Tears started to stream down my face, I tried to fight the thoughts that just kept coming.

I tried to hold them back. I tried to ignore them. I tried. And I tried, and I tried, and I tried.

They just kept pouring in.

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Hey guys! This part will be continued next week in Ch 50!

Love you all! Have a good day!