37. why they disappeared

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*tw: death and violence*

I didn't even realize how much time had passed until I heard one of the hunters inform another it was almost sun-down. Somewhere in all the waiting, I'd ended up sitting next to the door varying between asking whatever divine deity looked over heretics and witches to protect and help Kai, and scolding myself for letting him do something like this. Occasionally, Bonnie and Dorian, tried to convince me to go outside and wait there instead like everyone else had, besides them and the two other hunters that were ordered to stay with us. Though, it wasn't long until they realized there was no talking me into leaving my current position, so they decided to wait with me instead while they went through the Book of Shadows.

Enzo came back from time to time, to check on Bonnie and ask Arthur how things were going, to which Arthur responded with a very polite version of an 'I don't know' every time he asked. The first time I'd asked Arthur, he'd explained he had no way of knowing how things were going up there, he was only allowed in when the Masters wanted him to and so far, they'd refused but he'd promised he would keep trying and keep me updated. Although, I knew he would never tell me if things were going bad anyways, not when Kai had probably told him not to.

And I knew Kai had somewhat found comfort knowing that the worst they could do to him was hurt him but it just felt like he was underestimating them. He'd killed their people and destroyed their coven, centuries of legacies, severing their link to the world of the living by doing so. Hurting him seem like such a small price to pay for what he'd done. 'They're just ghosts, baby, I'll be fine' Kai's words find their way into my thoughts again but they only make me worry even more, ghosts were never just ghosts, well at least not in Mystic Falls "Maddie?" Bonnie's voice pulled me out of my thoughts "how busy are you tomorrow?" she asked and I frowned.

"Tomorrow?"

"The girls were planning a night out, god knows we need one" she said lightly and I hesitated for a few seconds, as if the thought of there being a tomorrow was a completely foreign concept to me.

"I don't need one" and it takes me a second to realize that I'm actually angry. I didn't know if I was mad at her for asking something like that when we didn't even know if Kai was okay or for not helping Kai, though I understood why she didn't. Part of me was angry at Kai for deciding to be this selfless, which I knew it was wrong... being angry at both of them was wrong. Maybe I was angry at myself but the more I thought about it, it felt like I was angry at the whole situation. It just felt like things were progressively getting more difficult for us, like we were swimming against a never ending current and I was exhausted. I didn't know how Kai had put up with two years worth of regressions, he always made it seem so... easy.

"Are you mad at me?" Bonnie asked, crouching down in front of me but I shook my head.

"No, I'm sorry... I'm just... tired" I mumbled and she gave me a reassuring smile.

"Maybe we should..." she trailed off, pausing for a second and her eyes widened all of sudden "we have to go" she urged, the tone of worry and fear in her voice throwing me off for a few seconds, and she grabbed my hand, forcing me to stand before I could say anything.

"What? No, I'm not going anywhere" I said firmly, standing in front of the door but her grip only got tighter.

"Maddie, listen to me, we have to go... now" she insisted and I frowned "Dorian, come on" she hurried him as he closed the book and stood up next to us, looking just as confused I was.

"Wait, Bonnie, what's wrong?" something had to be wrong, she almost seemed spooked, which didn't make sense at all.

"I..." and she hesitates "Maddie..." but she doesn't finish and this time my eyes widen, as I hear the heart-wrenching screams that were now coming from the inside of the room, the shrilling sound sending a chill down my spine and my heart stops as soon as I realize I recognize the screams... because I knew exactly who they were coming from.

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