if only | ha yoonbin

29

Dain's POV

Another day, as usual. I had this really weird dream about this English lady in the 1900s and apparently she died because she didn't obey her dad, who wanted her to marry some guy who actually have anger management and is violent.

Apparently she was supposed to marry a Polish man before that but she ran off with her two children. She died when her husband found her because she ran away from him.

Apparently her name is Gys Amaydass or something along the line. I just wanted to share it cause it's just so weird how it ended with her name.

Anyways, I woke up feeling rather confused and rather scared. I was in the Point of view of the English woman and the desperation to escape was real.

I got up, washed up, changed out and tied my hair before leaving the house with my ear piece in my ears as usual.

I got to the hall and the two of my good friends who are guys stood beside me. " We look hot today. " One of them, Sungmin said to the other and I burst into laughter.

The both of them are the ultimate ship in our squad. They are always together and just seem like they hate each other but they don't.

Not really hate but they like to disturb each other.

" You're so gross. " The other dude, Jinyoung replied and he noticed me staring so he smiled slightly.

When we skipped to PE, it was just Eun and I. We literally just talked throughout the lesson.

I guess you can say I have fear of balls. A group of people were playing volleyball today and as I was walking out, one of them wanted to toss the ball into the hoop. I placed my hand on my head and literally stopped before the hoop.

Turns out, I wasn't the one that got hit in the head instead it was another of my classmate who have no preparation for it.

I was hella embarrassed and I literally just ran out of the room to catch up with Eun.

When we were queuing, Eun nudged me. " That's Yoonbin's cousin. " I turned to the side to see this dude who looks a little like Yoonbin.

Both of them has this similarity and i guess, they just seem really cold. I'm not really sure what their personalities are like but I guess cold people tend to be wild around their friends.

Time passed pretty quickly and soon it's time to leave the school. I went up to Hana's class where I saw Eunchae and Jaera sitting there.

" Boo! " The two guys, aka our OTP appeared. Sungmin burst into laughter as he walked in, holding onto his stomach while Jinyoung just stared at him in disapproval.

They are really similar but they they are really different. They are like really good friends but they are so different that I question, why are they friends?

In my friend group, all of us have different personalities. Some are more like a dreamer while some are more logical and I, my friend is definitely more of a dreamer.

I wanted to shove Sungmin's crush things into his folder and he was like moving away.

He attempted to take my phone and gosh, it slipped off of the table and it fell onto the chair. Everyone then were shook to their next lives.

" Fish! " I smacked Sungmin on his back and he winced in pain.

Apparently there's a student that fought with the teacher during oral, we suspect it's Sungmin. " Are you the one that fought with the teacher? " I asked.

" I think you're the one! " Sungmin said and I shook my head.

" She said i'm pleasant! " I said and Sungmin can't hear what I said so I repeated again and it was at that moment, Yoonbin entered the classroom.

He has that cold expression plastered on his face again as he moved away from everyone.

He took his things before leaving again.

Apparently, he heard me saying that the teacher said i'm a pleasant student. I mean, I don't think there's any wrong in that but it just felt a little awkward.

The next day, it's my language oral.

Yoonbin's group got cancelled due to some emergency problem. I wanted to be one of the first few but actually being one of the last has its perks.

I became closer to my classmates who I'm not close to at the start. When I found out I was surrounded by guys, literally only guys I was pretty unwilling but I realised they aren't that bad and we actually became pretty close because of this.

Also, I sat behind Hyunsuk and I was so well-prepared when I went for the exam. When I actually faced the examiner, I panicked and literally whatever i've planned to say, i didn't managed to say it out and i felt regretful.

However, i'm trying my best to not regret.

Also, today nothing much really happened.

When the bell rang, I walked over to the cafeteria to get a packet drink. Just as I walked out, Yoonbin stood outside the class.

I went passed him and I went to get my drink. When I got back, I walked passed him as usual, with my emotionless face acting as if I didn't care about him being there.

As I was walking in, I removed the wrapper of the straw and was about to throw it away when I saw Yoonbin walking passed my class to leave the school.

This is our final language exam before the actual national one. Once it's over, we decide not to take to anymore then language class will be cancelled.

During language lesson today I moved about in my seat and whenever my eyes landed on Yoonbin, he's just staring into space when we were supposed to be writing whatever Miss Park wrote.

Is it weird how i'm always acting as if I don't care about him but yet, i'm always caring for him?

Even when he didn't realise it, even when he doesn't know I care, I don't really mind. I feel like it's better when he knows nothing, nothing at all.

It's also my brother's graduation day today.

While writing this now, i'm on my way to his school for his graduation. Not really sure what to expect out of it but oh well.

I looked up at the baby blue sky.

Life will get better, believe in yourself.

Live it till the fullest, with no regrets.

7th May 2019

i actually wrote this chapter for 2 days because i don't know, there's not much happening between us nowadays and like well, yeah.

welp!

exams are gonna resume this week zzz

also y'all should check this instagram account called @/eva.stories about a jewish girl called eva who's a holocaust victim. She wrote everything in a journal during wartime and her dream is to be a famous news reporter at the age of 24 but sadly didn't have the privilege to live till then.