Honest Reviews - CLOSED FOR CATCH UP

The Last Philosopher

Written by NickfEast

Cover
I find it doesnt correspond well with the actual story itself which is a shame. It's a great plot and all but the cover doesnt do it for me. It needs to have something big that goes along with what the story is about.

Summary
First thing I noticed instantly was that it needs to be put into paragraphs. It's a well written description, I cant fault that so fair play to you. I found it very enticing, I've got to give you that. It 100% catches your eye and makes you want to read. However, the cover doesnt.

(There was a few chapters so i haven't done it by each chapter)

Opinion
The words you have used are quite interesting. I'm honestly a little bit surprised at how well you've made them fit within the story.
I love the way you describe the black hole, I can almost imagine it myself. The layout of the chapters within the story is confusing.
The only downfall I find you have is that you need to make it more noticeable on what character your writing about.
Not going to lie but the place they live on is well described so well done with that. It also sounds like a really cool place to live.
I'm sorry but I really dont think you should add these _ in everywhere as it really does get annoying and slightly confusing because it takes the reader away.
Another thing, I think you should do is shorten your paragraphs as they are quite long.
I'm not sure if it's even possible but I would love if you were able to make your characters talk more at the start because I think it would be nice to get a glimpse of how they talk and the way they talk etc.
You use the word ponder way to much, its literally everywhere. Another word like contemplated maybe?
Nice prison gown. I'm not sure if your editing or not but I noticed you saying placeholder? Does that mean you've taken a few chapters down because it's the near start where I feel like theres a few chapters missing.
Spacing the parts where they talk from your paragraphs would be a lot more better as it's a little frustrating. One minute they're talking and then right next to the speech mark is a well described paragraph. Dont get me wrong that's amazing but I just feel like there should be a bit of a breather there for a reader.
Okay, I'm sorry but I dont like how one minute it's a super short chapter and then poof theres a really massive one.

Overall
I've never been a fan on stories based on planets etc, however I did find myself hooked on your story which is rare to happen as I dont get hooked on stories. And it was only from the first chapter. I struggled to find that many mistakes, I haven't fully finished reading it but I do look forward to finishing it soon. It really is an incredible story. I highly recommend reading it. A few author notes from you would be nice, it would really be interesting to know your thoughts on the cheaters.

Positives
●Spelling
●Punctuation
●Grammar
●Descriptions

Negatives
●Paragraphs
●Speech/Characters talking
●Using the word ponder way to much
●Chapter length
●Author notes
●Cover

Tips
●Try using an app or find someone that will make you a cover that goes along with your story.

●Go into a readers pov and I think you'll realise how jumbled up it looks a bit.

●Try searching/reading for a better word instead of the same old boring ones.

♡Amazing Story!♡
8/10
-Sarah