you're my safe place ~ MILEVEN ONE SHOTS~

As Long As I Have You

(this is dedicated to one of my faves lucastown who requested El telling Mike about everything that she has been through, it is hella emotional and I hope that you all enjoy this angst and fluff fest! Please leave comments letting me know what you think<3)

All of her life, El had wanted to reinvent herself. She wanted to draw a new life for herself, creating a magnificent and beautiful story that she could explain to everyone that she met. Like one of the interesting characters in one of her books, she would have a worthwhile life with incredible friends and a picture-perfect family. The characters in books experienced such triumphs and downfalls, whether they were a hero or the villain, each of them deserving their own story. As soon as she got her hands on a book, she absorbed the knowledge and fairy tales within through her curious eyes. They were distractions, moments in time where she could escape to another universe, a universe that kept away all of the bad and only filled itself with the good. If she could reinvent herself, she could design a world filled with sunshine and rainbows, a world with no room for any kind of heartache. Everyone would look at her with kind eyes, getting to know her instead of staring at her from afar like she was an animal in a cage. She would have more confidence, able to befriend anybody without nerves swirling within her stomach and words getting stuck in her throat. She would give everything away in a second if she could, sell the world that she had for the one that she wanted. She would reinvent everything so that she didn't have to explain the sad truth behind her happy facade. 

Sometimes she found herself almost forgetting, the memories catching up to her like remembering dreams throughout the day. At times they only felt like bad dreams, experiences in her mind that she could watch, tricking herself that it didn't happen to her. She would find herself smiling alongside her friends, laughing at one of Dustin's stupid jokes and suddenly every dark feeling inside of her chest would disappear. She would let Hopper ruffle her hair, looking at her as if she was nothing but his own child, something that she could perhaps trick herself into truly believing. 

"El, tell him that he is being ridiculous" Mike complained, glaring stubbornly at Hopper who simply rolled his eyes, disinterested in the fourteen-year old's antics. 

She looked down at her feet. "I want to go..."

"Kid, I'm sorry but the answer is no" Hopper sighed, rubbing his head. "I can't trust that you will be safe for the entire weekend, especially as you don't know the area-"

"That's why I would go!" Mike butted in sharply. 

Hop turned to him with a stiff stare. "Did I ask for your opinion?"

The teenager huffed back in return. 

"El, there is nothing that I want more for you to go, believe me I want Wheeler off my back" the man rolled his eyes, ignoring Mike's glare, "but I don't want you to be so far away. If something happened, you wouldn't have me there and nobody would be able to protect you. There is only so much your friends and their parents can do...and none of them understand the precautions. I already told you that Joyce and I can't come."

"Date night?" Mike teased lightly, rolling his eyes. 

Hop sent the boy a cold look. "Shut it, Wheeler."

"I can do this" El demanded, clenching her own fists with determination. "I don't want to be held back, and it isn't fair that everyone else gets to go. I will be really careful and nobody has to do anything to protect me, I can handle myself with-"

"This isn't like Chicago, El" Hop argued, shaking his head. 

"What?"

A silence enveloped the room, the sound filtering out and filling with nothing but white noise. Her mind went blank as if she was entering the void, ears ringing with protest as if they were trying to avoid the situation themselves. She didn't know what to say, frowning down at the ground as if she had been trying to block out that portion of her life, the portion that wasn't picture-perfect like in her fairy tales. She swallowed quietly, gathering enough strength to glance at Mike who had turned as white as a sheet. Underneath the slight worry and confusion, there was hurt. Part of him didn't like feeling left in the dark, always feeling that he knew El better than anyone, only to realize that perhaps he didn't know her at all.