Vile Games (book two)

6 - frat parties and panic attacks

song for chapter:
teenage mind - tate mcrae
| lost in the puzzle of a teenage mind |
(highly recommend + put on repeat)

***FLASHBACK***

4 months after moving in together
san diego, california.
saturday, 10:30pm
jaylee's pov

the hair tie that was holding up my hair slowly began to fall from the amount of jumping and dancing not only I was doing, but everyone around me as well.

every so often, my eyes traveled to ethan who was further in the crowd of drunk college students. his eyes repeatedly looked at me as if he were watching me to make sure I was okay.

his forehead was glistening, his hair was partially wet due to him sweating and there was a red tint underneath his eyes from the heat inside the house.

his white aligned teeth smiled widely as he continued to dance around, still looking over to me every once in a while. I could feel my cheeks flustering from his eyes being on me, but also because of how much fun he looks like he's having.

both of us looked away for a couple of seconds as we enjoyed the moment.

I felt cold fingers touch my shoulder from behind me, causing an immediate uneasy feeling to flood my entire body. the coldness of the touch reminded me of sammy's, causing my entire face to completely blank.

I felt like I fell into an instant state of shock.

only my head turned, slow yet steady as I was stuck in a trance. this feeling inside of me wasn't just cold, it was numbness; emptiness.

I looked at the male fingers that were still on the skin of my shoulder, then I turned to look up to whoever it was that was thriving for my attention.

he was a blond with hair that fell to his shoulders, eyes brown with a mix of yellow in them, on the tall side—around six two, but skinny.

seeing he had my attention, a small smile began to spread across his lips as his hand fell from my shoulder. "jaylee jackson, right?" he questioned, his voice seeming deep.

I could feel myself blank staring at him as if I were in a state of shock from the feeling of emptiness that was still full inside of me. my eyes looked him fully up and down, then hardly nodded my head.

"my girlfriend is obsessed with your singing." he let his hand run through his long blond hair to get it out of his face. "her mom always lets her listen to your recordings up at atlantic records." he told me, still smiling.

no matter how hard I tried to refocus on the conversation between me and this guy, I couldn't. my ptsd from sammy is something i've been trying to control for so long and it hasn't gotten any better.

my heart felt like it was slowly beginning to beat quicker the more I thought about sammy. the more I thought about how this strangers fingers of my skin, I felt nauseous.

"are you okay?" he questioned, his eyebrows narrowed in a confused manner as he looked down to me with concern.

my eyes were wide, staring at the floor as I began to turn around and walk away from him with no explanation. my hearing was becoming more muffled by the second, allowing myself to hear my own chest start to breathe heavier.