Superimposed

11

"I need to talk to you" Lisa began one of the hardest conversations she's ever had to have in her life, "About your dad" Her voice was quiet and as the two sat in a quaint French coffee shop Taron sat stiffly. Waiting for whatever it is that she's going to say. Did dad have an affair? Did he just leave for no reason?
"I want you to know that I love you and I only kept this from you because-" She hesitated, gripped the hot cup of coffee as the steam rose just in front of her face.

There weren't many people in today, usually, this place is heaving with people - it's one of the most popular coffee places in Dulwich. Paris memorabilia covered shelves, miniature Eiffel towers and French words.
The smell of fresh French confectionary filled the air, yet Taron wasn't focusing on any of this and neither was Lisa. They were both staring at each other, Lisa wondering how to say it and Taron wondering what it even is that she was going to say.
"Well I love you and I wanted to protect you from it, but there's no point and I know that now. It just hurts, I've never said the words out loud before"
"Mum" Taron's voice was eager yet comforting, he reached for her hand and she accepted it, gripping her smaller fingers around his knuckles.

"Your dad didn't leave me, he um- took his own life" Lisa said slowly, every word said with care. But nothing could prepare her to watch as her son's face dropped, every bone in his body slump and she watched as his mouth twitched. As if he was going to say something, but decided against it every time. He drew his hand away and rested both hands on his lap, leaning back in his chair he said nothing.

"All these years I thought that if I could just-" She trailed off, "If I could just protect you and try to put the past behind me. That's why I married Phil because I thought that if I married again it'd be like Richard never left but then- Phil wasn't the man I thought he was and I just-"
"Mum it's okay" Taron finally said, cutting his mum off as she tried desperately to explain herself
"But it's not okay, I'm such a shit mum. I should've told you sooner and just treated you like the adult you acted like all the time and I know you did all that for me and that's what makes this even harder. It made me not want to tell you and if you believing you could see your dad again someday was keeping you going then, I couldn't take that from you"
"Why didn't I go to the funeral?" Taron asked, snapping his eyes back to Lisa's as they'd started to wander down to the table, he dug his teeth into his bottle lip, "Why did I not go to my own dad's funeral?" He reiterated, feeling anger building inside him. But he kept calm, as calm as he could do knowing that his dad had taken his own life.

After a long conversation and three coffee's later, the two left the coffee shop. Taron linked arms with his mum and he felt closer to her than he ever did.
He was oblivious to his mother's struggle as he continued with his own life oblivious to her hurting.

Although he knew he couldn't have done anything, he did feel a little guilty. He'd been so caught up in his own life he hadn't properly checked if his mum was okay. Only ever using her as a person to vent to, letting her carry even more burdens in her stride.

Lisa was a little taken back by Taron linking arms with her in public, something he'd never done before. He never showed affection in public because to Taron it was a sign of weakness; which wasn't a message he wanted to get across to the people of Dulwich.
It had taken someone special to break his self-obsession with hiding himself.

"There's something I should tell you, mum," Taron said, his mind drifting to thoughts of Belle, "I met someone" He couldn't help the smile forming on his lips.

"Oh yeah?" Lisa smirked, nudging his arm which made Taron laugh.
Taron proceeded to gush about Belle as they walked back towards the house, but once they got outside all happiness drained from Taron. His face went white as they stood outside the place.
"Come in - for a cup of tea at least" Lisa offered
"Nah, I've just had three cups of coffee mum. I'm good" Taron told her, forcing a smile, "I'm going to go knock for Belle - I'll see you soon though?"
"I'm thinking of divorcing Phil" Lisa blurted out, "After saying everything to you I think it's the best thing" She explained, dropping her face to look at her shoes
"Really?"
Taron was surprised, he didn't expect his mum to actually get to this point even if it was someone he'd wanted.
"If he's the one driving you away I'll get rid of him. I don't want to lose you too"
"You won't lose me, mum," Taron tells her, opening his arms for her to hug him; which Lisa accepted, even if he did smell of cigarettes - smoking wasn't ever something she liked Taron doing.

"If you do, do it because you want to. Don't do it for me, if you're happy and you love him then stay with him" Taron said this carefully, filling each word with sincerity as he held onto his mum. He knew Lisa didn't love him, she couldn't stand him at all. Taron just didn't want his mum to divorce someone because of him or in fear of losing him. He wasn't going to abandon his mum completely, her being with Phil obviously impacted their relationship, but he'd never just stop seeing her.
"Do you want to come in for some food at least?" Lisa offered her son to come inside once more. She'd paid for all the coffees at the shop, without making a fuss because she knew Taron didn't have any money. He would usually take cash from Phil's wallet that he left carelessly lying around. The only thing he'd spend it on would be cigarettes and alcohol, of course.

"Um-" Taron hesitated, he was starving. Not eating for a couple of days isn't great and he really did want some food right now
"He's not here, he won't be back till 5"
"Okay"

Taron and his mum spent the rest of the afternoon together, eating food, drinking tea and just talking. They'd never felt more close and Taron hadn't felt this content for a while, only momentarily with Belle. But he felt truly happy with his mum and being in the house reminded him of what it was like to actually have a home. Lisa still didn't know where her son was staying and Taron had no intention of telling her. As it approached half past four, Taron decided to make a move. He went upstairs to his room to get a fresh set of clothes, choosing some black jeans, red snapback, grey Adidas jacket with red stripes and a black t-shirt. After one look around his room and a deep sigh, he left again; not wanting to torture himself by staying any longer.

"So where are you off to now then?" Lisa asked, leaning against the door frame of the open front door that Taron was on the other side of"Um- probably going to go see Belle" He said
"Then after that?"
"See Ash and the boys" He smirked, lying straight through his teeth "Gotta celebrate"
"With no money" Lisa raised her eyebrows at him
"Nah I've got some money back at the place I'm staying" Taron lied again, the smile fading a little
"Wait here," Lisa told him as she disappeared back into the house. 

Taron perched on the small wall next to the front door with his hands in his jacket pocket as he waited.
"Make this last would you?" Taron looked up to see Lisa handing him a wad of notes
"Mum-"
"Take it, I'm not stupid - I know you're sleeping rough, the state of your clothes was horrible" She gestured to Taron, "I can't make you stay here and you are old enough to look after yourself, but if you won't stay then take the money" She explained, waving the notes in the air. Taron took them and counted out £100 before putting it in his back pocket, "Thanks mum, I'll pay you back"