I Promise You, You'll Never Be Alone

Alone, Again

-Hello, I wanted to put a warning in the beginning because this chapter has mentions of abuse-

-Songs in this chapter, #1 Paralysed by NF, #2 Idontwannabeyouanymore by Billie Eilish. Start #1 now-

Ava pulled her knees closer to her chest as she sobbed. Thoughts raced through her head, am I good enough for anyone? Why is this happening to me? Why does everyone leave me in the end? She raised her head and looked back to her phone, there was another message from Sarah.

"You didn't deserve my friendship anyway! You don't deserve my kindness, I hope your father ends up killing you!" Ava let out another sob, she knew she didn't deserve anything. Other than being beaten by her dad, she deserved that, right?

She shook her head and rested her head back on her knees. She bit her lip to keep herself quiet, she knew if she made too much noise her father would come and yell at her again. She tried remembered the conversation that had led to Sarah ending their friendship.

Sarah: Hey! How are you doing?

Ava: Oh, hey! Not very good, it's been a while since we talked huh?

Sarah: Yeah, what's wrong? Did he hurt you again?

Sarah: I swear, I'm going to beat his ass

Ava: No, I've just been having a bad day. Do you want to hear about it?

Sarah: No, why would I want to hear about your day? I'm just checking in on you, that's all

Ava: Wait, what? I'm sorry, I'm confused

Sarah: You're so stupid, I guess I might as well tell you now. I've been using you dumbass, I check in on you every once in a while and make sure you're ok so that you're there for me when I need you. But, I don't need you anymore. I've found someone else, so we don't need to be friends anymore

Ava:...

Sarah: We're done, don't text me again.

Sarah: You didn't deserve my friendship anyway! You don't deserve my kindness, I hope your father ends up killing you!

Ava leaned her head against the wall she was sitting in front of and looked up at her ceiling. Why is my life falling apart? She thought to herself. She shook her head and stood up. Her legs felt weak from sitting in that position against the wall for so long but she shook it off. 

Ava picked up her phone from off the floor before walking over to her bed. As she sat on the bed, she tried texting Sarah again.

Ava: Hey, I'm sorry. Can we start over?

The text didn't go through, Sarah had blocked her and Ava knew it. Ava always tried to give people a second chance, even when they hurt her. She sighed and let herself fall back onto her bed.

"What's next?" she asked, questioning her future and what would happen to her. "Will I be stuck in this cycle forever?" Ava knew she probably would be, there was no one to help her anymore. Ava sighed and sat up, she looked around her room while tears still spilled out of her eyes. 

She felt so small, so insignificant and useless. She turned her head to the window when she heard the sound of her mothers car. Getting up off the bed, she walked over and peeked through the window.

-Play #2 now-

Looking out, she saw her mother getting out of the car. Her dad was out there too, yelling at her. Ava wiped her eyes and made her way to her bedroom door. She waited until she knew that both of her parents were inside before she walked out of the room.

As she walked downstairs, she caught a glimpse of her mother and father in the kitchen. "She doesn't deserve to go!" her father yelled, do I not deserve anything? Ava asked herself. "I think it'll be a good experience for her," "you know nothing woman! You're never even home, she's barely even your daughter!"

A tear fell from Ava's cheek as her mother said her next words. "Well, all you do is drink and abuse her! You're lucky I don't call CPS," her father scoffed. "You're lucky I don't call CPS!" Ava sighed and sat down on the stairs, listening to the conversation tears kept streaming down her face.

"She's going and you can't say anything about it, she deserves to have at least one good summer." Ava's father rolled his eyes and took a swig of his beer, "fine, but only for a week." Ava's mom smiled as if she had accomplished something.

"Ava! Love! Come downstairs, will you? I have a surprise!" Ava sighed and wiped the tears from her face before making her way down the rest of the stairs. "Yes, mother?" Ava asked as she rested her elbows on the kitchen counter.

"you're going to go to a summer camp for a week! Isn't that exciting! You'll get to meet new people and have new friendships!" Ava nodded, "yeah, sounds great mom," she said in a monotone voice.

No one seemed to notice how down she was, but then again, no one ever did. "You'll be leaving in two days, so you should make sure you have everything you'll need ok?" Ava nodded, thinking about how at least a summer camp would be better than here.

Ava looked up and saw her mom heading for the front door, "are you leaving again mom?" Ava's mother didn't answer and walked out the front door. After hearing the car pull out of the driveway Ava turned to her father.

He glared at her and she took a step backward, "you better behave yourself there and not tell anyone about anything!" Ava's dad said harshly, Ava gulped and nodded. "Y-yes sir, I won't say anything."

Ava's father smirked and raised his hand as if to hit her, Ava flinched. "Get upstairs!" he yelled. Ava nodded and ran upstairs. When she got in her room, she shut the door and made sure her father wasn't following her upstairs.

Looking over at her clock, Ava saw it was almost time for bed. Ava sighed, she knew she wasn't going to get any sleep. She walked over to her dresser and pulled out her pajamas while thinking about the summer camp.

Ava never really left the house, she wasn't allowed to. She wasn't good with human interaction and she sure as hell wasn't good at talking to people. Ava sighed and crawled into her bed after putting on her pajamas. 

"Who knows," she whispered to herself, "maybe I'll find a friend there. Though, it's very doubtful." Ava reached over and pulled one of her pillows close to her. Even though it was rare for her to sleep, holding a pillow made it better.

-Hello everyone! I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of this book! Please, let me know if there is anything I could do better, I would love to hear your opinions! I love you all so much, thank you for reading! I hope you have an amazing rest of your day/night!-