edit: okay so i just reread this for the first time in a while and AND HOLY SHIT ITS SO BAD
like not inappropriate but just the writhing sucks so um read at your own risk
you are laying in your bed for the fifth day in the row,drowning in your own thoughts and tears."how?what did i do wrong?how does one person go from wanting to be with you for ever to never even talking to you again"you wonder. everyone you know are concerned for you.you haven't seen the sunlight in days. you just gone through the worst breakup imaginable. "maybe i was never right for love,maybe he never loved me" you can't keep these horrible thoughts out of your brain. you feel ur phone vibrate and you didn't think anything of it, just thinking it was yet another person asking if you were okay, but you checked the contact name and your heart jumped.it was Calum.your now ex boyfriend."i'm coming over" you read off your phone. of course you were happy,you finally are getting to see the love of your life that just broke up with you. "he's probably just coming over to grab his shit and leave" you think.that thought made you more sad thinking how he probably doesn't want you back just as much as you want him back. you would take this boy back in a heartbeat. you finally came out of your bed after days of laying there, feeling mentally dead.you looked at yourself in your mirror realizing how rough you looked,your eyes are puffy and red,your cheeks are pink and flustered and your hair is tied up in the messiest bun you've ever seen looking like a greasy,tangly,rats nest. "i don't even fucking give a shit at this point" you say as you slap your hands down and walk out of your bedroom to your bathroom,you brush your teeth and don't bother to do anything else.you take another look at yourself in the mirror and noticed you're still wearing his sweatshirt.you're surprised you still have tears left to cry. tears seemed to be permanently streaming from your eyes every since the words "i think we need to breakup" came out Cal's mouth. "Calum's mouth".you repeat those words multiple times. you miss his mouth,you missed his soft kisses before bed,the rough kisses when you knew exactly what he wanted, the neck kisses he gave you when he snuck up behind you while making food, the kisses he would give you on your hand when you both would watch tv, the kisses he would plant on your shoulders when you both would slow dance in the living room and he would bury his face in between your neck and shoulders or the way he would smother his face in your neck when he would get embarrassed. you came back to reality and realized you started bawling and then suddenly you hear a knock at the door,it was calum. you tried getting rid of the evidence that you've been crying for the 5th day straight, but there was no covering it up. you walked over the door and took a deep breathe as you finally opened the door you saw your ex boyfriend standing there with black sweat pants hung low on his hips,a black shirt, and his checkered old skool vans,he knows how much you love him when he dresses down. "did he come over just to mess with me, tease me with what i can't have?" your thought ended when Calum speaks up, "you look good" he said as he chuckled, you picked up that he was being sarcastic and you let out a laugh and said thanks. you let him into your apartment and you both sit down on your couch. "i don't like seeing you this way" calum let's outs " like what? heartbroken? if you don't like seeing me this way then why'd you make me like this?" you ask , you weren't even mad, you just were very very hurt and Calum could obviously see that. Calum hated what he did to you. "you know i never meant to hurt you i just had to do what's-" you cut him off by saying, "yes i know it's not me its you and all that other bull shit but why? we could of figured you out together,like we always do" you get choked up and the tears start to flood in again. Calum scoots in closer to you and wiped away your tears. his fingers on your cheek felt like lit matches,it was a firey sensation. you longed for his touch no matter how minimal it was,everything seemed alright in the world for a few seconds and then his hand came back down and back to his lap. you look up at him with the most helpless face and Calums heart broke, he saw what he had done to you and he needed to fix it, he wanted to put together your heart and make you the (y/n) he knew and loved. as you looked up at Calum you realized what you wanted,you needed him,now,now and forever,you needed him. "calum?" you softly spoke. "yes (y/n)" "Calum, i need you." you said more confidently "what" he questioned, but he knew exactly what you meant. "i...need...you" and with no hesitation he leaned forward and kissed you and you immediately kissed him back,you felt him give off a small smile. out of all the kisses you both shared this one felt different,it felt like this was him telling me he wanted me forever but instead of saying it, he said it with a kiss. This was the best kiss you've ever had with him, you loved his kisses, but this one was your favorite. All of the pain you felt in the last few days had suddenly vanished.You were now sitting on his lap with your legs wrapped around him, he picked you and continued kissing you, he walked over to your bedroom door and you leaned back out of the kiss to say, " you probably don't want to go in there" remembering that there's a few bowls of ice cream left in there that you had been crying into the past week "it's a little messy" "i don't care i just want you". those words sent butterflies throughout your whole body,he opened the door and slowly you on your back and he was on top of you. you ran your hands through his hair and flipped him over so your on top. this night wasn't going to end in makeup sex because you didn't want that to be the reason you guys got back together. after a few more minutes of a hot make out session you pulled back and kissed Cal on the forehead and got up and walked to the restroom.You didn't need to use the bathroom, but what to see what you looked like.You were glowing,you're eyes weren't even puffy anymore and they looked a shade of green they have never looked before. Your cheeks were pink, but in a good way,as you made your way back to the room you could tell calum already made himself comfy, "god,he's so cute" you accidentally spit out under your breathe, "what babe?" Calum says, but you knew he heard you , " i said god,your so ugly" you teased. he gets up and pulls you on to the bed and then on to him so now you're on top of him laying on his chest. you plant a small kiss on his lip and say "i need you forever, I don't want this to end" "it won't baby.it won't" Calums reply's "but how do you know that because that's what you said the first time and look what happened" you say sadly. "well you're with me now aren't you" he says reinforcing me that we will be forever. "and i know because i want you to move in with me?" the question sent shivers down my spine all you could do was shake your head yes and kiss him.
