songs about us I seaycee oneshots (sean and kaycee)

you can call me - part 2

a special thank you and dedication to AugustApollo for helping me and pushing my mind to write this, you are truly amazing 💛

He didn't think it would be forever, being honest he had always been sure of it — he knew one day she would grow out of him and they would be over, and yet he let himself be played still because the ending didn't matter as long as he got to be with her, for as long as she still wanted to be with him.

He thought it would be sooner than later, he thought it would happen fast, he thought at most a few more weeks and then the thing they never started would be over — but then it didn't.

Kaycee never ended things and he never tried to leave either. She never left for college, she never wanted college in the first place, she wanted to paint and sell her art, and that's what she started — opened a small online shop to sell her paintings, so she stayed in town and for months they kept themselves doing all the secret things they started.

They would still meet for casual sex or make-out sessions, they would still smoke weed and all of the other things they used to do. They didn't start new things, but they added new things to the old ones — now she would call him for sex and let him stay the night, and they would have breakfast together in the mornings, now they would smoke weed but also watch movies together, and they would have sex in his old car but after they just went out for dinner or something.

And for an entire year, that's what they did — and Sean never thought he would ever think on the possibility of ending things, but now he was. 

He was graduating and different than her, he wanted to go to college, in fact, he was accepted in Columbia and he was very excited about, he had no uncertainty about going — even if that meant moving to New York if it meant getting over Kaycee.

"There's something I have to tell you." He said.

"Hm?" She asked while they walked through the empty streets of the fancy neighborhood, on the way to her house.

"I, hm... I was-"

"Come on, sweetie, use your words." She mocked, making him laugh — something he discovered during this year was that she was funny, and his laugh sounded for her.

"I got accepted to Columbia, you know, New York." He told the news and waited for her to say something, but she didn't. "It isn't really news, I've known for a while now."

"And why you didn't say anything before?" She asked, sounding a bit mad — not to him though.

"I don't know." Except he did — he tried to postpone the end.

"And why are you saying it now?" She asked again.

"I don't know." Except he did — there wasn't much more time before he had to go.

A silence took place between them as if it was physically there — they weren't holding hands before but were so close that their arms would brush onto each other, now there was the whole street between them.

"You can't go." She said, never looking at him.

"I wasn't asking for permission, kayc." He answered.

"You can't go." She said once more.

He didn't notice when she stopped walking, he kept going. "But I'm going, you can't decide such a thing for me."

"I don't want you to go." She said in the middle of the residential street, it caught his attention how the phrase was different this time and yet he felt mad — she had no right to be doing this to him right now.

He scoffed. "And why does that matter, Kaycee?" With some distance between them, he turned around. "Guess what, I'm not your puppet."

"I don't think you are my puppet." She said, he sounded angry now but she didn't, in fact, she appeared nervous, staring to the ground — different.

"Then tell me what the fuck do you think because I'm tired of trying to read your mind, Kaycee." He said, angry but pleading. "More than a year, we've been doing this for more than a year, and still doesn't look like you want more from me than a casual thing." He gave space for her to talk, but she didn't.

"Why does it matter if you don't want me to go if you don't give me a reason to stay?" He basically shouted — he was begging for her to give him a reason, she kept herself quiet.

Sean scoffed. "You know what? Fuck, I'm over this, I'm going home, have a great life Kayc."

He turned around to leave, but before he could give a single step, she said loud and clear: "I'm yours."

"What?" He turned around, voice almost a whisper.

"You got it, the wrong sweetie, it's not that you're mine..." Her eyes fixed on his, she repeated. "I'm yours, so you can't go."

She took a deep breath, walking a few steps in his direction, not ending the distance between them — he could see water on the edge of her eyes. "Most nights I hardly sleep, I... I guess can't sleep without you now. And I think of you whenever I'm alone, or when I'm not alone and it sucks 'cause I didn't want to feel this way and try not to, and I just-"

She stopped abruptly, trying to keep herself strong, trying not to cry and catch a breath, but failing — and for the first time, Sean was seeing Kaycee being fully herself. "I-"

Noticing she wouldn't be able to talk, Sean pulled her into a tight hug, and then she was finally able to breathe — he remembered the conversation they had a year ago, he remembered how belonging to someone was everything she never wanted, so allowing herself to be his and actually saying such a thing out loud was like stepping on shattered glass, it was painful and scary to her.

He watered her, he watered her land and now she wasn't on fire anymore but things were still burnt, therefore it was so hard for her to open up still — she wasn't in pain anymore, but she still remembered how it felt like to be.

"Come with me." He blurted the words.

She lifted her head to look at him. "What?"

"Come to New York with me, leave everything and come with me." He asked. "I know it's an insane idea but... I'm not ready to be over you just yet."

They both chuckled as he used the same words she said to him a year ago when she wanted for him to stay. "Are you sure you still want more? You haven't seen half of the mess I'm.,."

She fixed his fringe as she asked, it was different than the other times she did such a thing before it was always an act of boldness, now it felt shy — he smiled.

"Now I do." He said before kissing her.

And she moved to New York with him, and then they started new things — like fighting over random things and having sex to make up to ever fight, smoking weed together on the balcony of their pretty average but a well-decorated apartment, having movie nights and date nights and every other kind of night they could invent, along with so many other things.

They weren't the perfect couple, but somehow it worked — it wasn't a secret anymore, he was hers as much as she was his.

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