Crystal Eyes

-(28)-

-J a m e s-

      Jade and Jude wobbled in early in the morning. I hadn't noticed them until little bodies leaped atop my bed and embraced me. My hands came around them in return. I couldn't believe it was finally the day, almost a week later. 

      "Jamie, mom said you have to get ready," Jude shouted, pointing her finger at me. Even though this was supposed to be a day of mourning, I laughed once. "Mom said you should come down," Jade mumbled sweetly, running her finger through my hair. "Are you gonna be okay?" 

      I hugged Jade against me and stroked her hair. "Yes, I'll be alright." She didn't seem convinced by my answer. Jade was too intelligent for that. "But you lost your dad and your girlfriend in one day, that's a lot." 

      Almost a week later, Ellery's crystal eyes still draped in my head relentlessly. Her eyes that watered and her lips that had spoken to me. She'd spoken to me, and I'd ignored her. Just that thought caused my eyes to water, but I wouldn't cry in front of Jade and Jude. 

      Was it bad that her voice echoed in my head constantly? She had sounded relatively normal, maybe a little shaky and might've sounded like she had a few marshmallows in her mouth but I'd have never known she was deaf had she initially spoken. She made the first person to hear her since the crash me, and I ignored her. How much more of a douche could I get? 

      "You two should get ready, I'll be down soon." They raced off, clad in black dresses and matching headbands and shoes. I stumbled out of bed, took a quick shower and dressed in my suit. I was wearing one of my dad's red and black ties, his favorite before he'd gone to prison. He would be proud that I was wearing it since I absolutely hated ties. 

      Down in the kitchen, Jade and Jude were sitting on the countertop and munching on some breakfast bars. Mom was talking subtly to Rudy, whispering and talking slow. My shoes clicked against the tile, her head popped up to my attention. "Oh, James. You look so handsome," my mother cooed, running her hand over my tie and through my gelled hair. "He'd have been so proud of you." 

      "Thanks, that means a lot, mom." I was no longer angry with her, I couldn't be. She was my mom, and I understood her motives. "I saw Ellery walking the block with Declan and Ryan and Jenna this morning," Rudy said, I wasn't sure why. My heart ached for her, ached to have her hand in mine and her body by my side at his funeral but I knew it was wrong to invite her. So very wrong. 

      "Did she look okay?" The words shot from my mouth. Both mom and Rudy cast me a skeptical look. I hadn't seen her at school recently, no one had, I was becoming increasingly worried. "Yes, she looked fine. Ryan too. There was a hefty looking engagement ring on Jenna's finger."

      Rudy noticed everything, I mean everything so I wasn't surprised that he noticed the ring. I wondered how Ellery felt about their engagement. I shook my head, ridding my mind of her. She'd never forgive me, there was no use in thinking about her. 

      "Are you hungry?" I just grabbed a breakfast bar and munched on that nervously as she asked. Mom had been worried about me, I was cooped up in my room most of the day, playing games and talking to Danny and Brock about the situation. I didn't blame her for worrying.

      "We should get going." 

      I stepped outside while they all gathered their things. The air seemed fresh and flowy, despite it being a depressing day for us...me. How could the day be so bright right now? How when I'd just lost my father and the girl I love? How could everything around me be peppy and amazing while my life was crashing down? 

      I couldn't help myself, I swung at the pole nearest to me. My fist collided with it, a sharp ring vibrated my ears, I immediately regretted doing it when my knuckles throbbed and tingled. I clutched my aching hand to my chest and bent over, letting out a forced sigh and a grunt. "Crap," I started, meaning to say something else.