The Ill-mannered Door (humorous sci-fi)

30.1: A Time for Tea

As we sat in the parlor of Muriel's home, sipping tea and munching on some stunningly delightful biscuits, I could see why the king didn't want us traipsing through it in our formerly soiled condition.

The home was lovely, and not at all what I had expected of a country farmhouse from this era. It was filled with handcrafted rugs and custom woodworking with intricate carvings throughout. In addition, Muriel had explained that all of the furniture had been built by hand by her husband in the workshop I had seen at the back of the barn. The overall feel was very warm and cozy.

As I sat in a comfortably cushioned chair, drinking my tea and munching happily on my biscuit, I realized that for the first time in a very long time... I felt human again.

"I'm sorry, Muriel is it?" I asked and she nodded, so I continued, "Yes, sorry, but I'm afraid that not much has been explained to me on this little journey we've been on. So, may I ask how you know the king?"

Muriel smiled and said, "He's my son-in-law, dear."

"Oh. Now, that would mean that you're the queen's mother, but if that's the case, shouldn't you be the queen?"

"Well, dear, when my husband died..." Muriel said, but paused for a moment before continuing, "I decided to abdicate the throne to Esmerelda with the stipulation that she must first marry. So, she met Barry not long after that and once they were married, they became the new king and queen. It was time, dear. I'd had my fill of power by then."

I nodded sagely and lowered my mug to my lap. It was at that moment that I was reminded of what I was wearing. I was suddenly very self-conscious, which reminded me to cross my legs and carefully adjust the rather short, and much too frilly, dressing-gown.

When I looked up, the others were all watching me. I felt my face flush. It was like one of those times when everyone turns to stare at you at just the moment you've chosen to pick your nose, the offending digit buried to the first knuckle.

"Muriel," the king said, breaking the uncomfortable silence that had settled as the others observed my discomfiture, "may I ask if you've seen Esmerelda recently?"

"Of course, dear," Muriel replied and then smiled. "She was just here this morning to get a few things and say goodbye."

Derek coughed and lowered his mug with a serious look on his face as he said, "Sorry, did you say she was here to say goodbye?"

"Yes, dear."

"Goodbye?" the king said, discomposed. "But where was she going?"

"I thought you knew, Barry," Muriel said, a look of deep concern coming over her countenance. "She's taking Esmi and going through the wormhole to your planet, dear."

Derek dropped his mug, which thumped upon the plush, white rug beneath our feet and spilled its remaining contents.

The king stared aghast, his jaw working up and down while his brain tried unsuccessfully to come to grips with the sheer gravity of what he had just heard.

And I stopped mid-bite on a biscuit... before continuing to munch.

Yes, of course, it was a tense moment, but don't look at me like that! I paused for what I felt was a respectful length of time, and you have no idea just how scrumptious those biscuits actually were, do you? No, you don't. I'll have you know that they had been freshly made and were still warm, so you can just get stuffed right along with Derek and the king!