✓ [18+] A THOUSAND MILES FROM NOWHERE

XXV. What Ifs Never Change Anything

A/N: Sad moment ahead regarding Nate.
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XXV. What Ifs Never Change Anything

NATHAN

The sound of glass shattering beneath my fist helps wake me up from this trance I've been in for the last fifteen minutes as I stood outside the interrogation room the whole time Bex told her dad everything.

I'd already warned him ahead of time I would. He didn't tell me I couldn't, I'm sure already expected that I would. Not that I would've listen to his orders not to. This was regarding the woman I love more than any other in this world. You're damn right I'm going to hear the truth behind the shit I saw within that file.

I stood and listened to the woman I've loved since I was fucking seventeen years old talk about how that monster hurt her. How he took the beautiful girl I knew nearly all my life and broke her down, piece by piece.

Visions of those pictures of Bex's beaten body enter my mind and I want to hit the wall again.

I need to calm down, I already broke a picture that was hanging on the wall across from me. I quickly walk into the bathroom across the hall and grab a paper towel, holding it to my now bleeding hand.

When I walk out to the main area, everyone in the room turns to look at me. They have look of hurt and worry—for Bex.

Everyone has already seen it since the BOLO went out nation wide by now. Each one of us had gotten the email and they all saw the same thing I did.

The girl we knew for years, looking like a complete ghost.

"Get back to work," I order loudly and everyone turns back to what they were doing.

I need to get out of here. I need to get away and calm the fuck down.

I'm not running away though, fuck no. I just need to calm down and get my thoughts together before I talk to Bex. I think about the look on her face when I wouldn't talk to her at first. I already know what was going through her mind.

Not again.

She was terrified I was pulling the same shit I did ten years ago. God knows I wouldn't. Not now, not ever again.

I'm going to stay by her side from now on and especially through all of this. She needs me to be there for her and I want to be there more than anything. I may have broken her heart, but I didn't crush her spirit like that monster did.

I would've never imagined hitting Bex. Even though she drove me crazy growing up, I would've never went there.

I would've never made her change, make her choose. I love everything about her and it's her personality, what she is inside that made me fall in love with her in the first place. Why would I change that?

I would've never kept her from her family. I know family is the most important thing in the world to her and I feel the same way. Call it growing up in a small town, call it what you want, but at the end of the day the last people who will undoubtably have your back, is your family.

Lastly, I sure as hell would've never harmed her while she was pregnant with my child. I would've protected her even more. I would've loved her even more for her choosing our baby over me. That's how it's suppose to be. Your child should always come first.