My Secrets

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*Trigger Warning*

By the time he reached Ant's house, Dec feels as if his limbs have turned cold What if he doesn't wait to hear me out... Ant had worked hard for months to get this deal and I have spoilt it with a few seconds! If only Stephen had not pulled out ..wait! What if that's what he wanted? So that Ant will hate me? He won't do that to Ant, will he? Stephen did seem genuinely concerned and of course he won't do anything that will bring problems for Ant! It's all on me! And my wretched life!!

As the car stopped infront of Ant's home, Dec hesitates a bit before stepping out. He lifts his hand to knock the door but before he can, the door opens to show Ant. Dec's heart stops in his chest and he swallows hard, tears threatening to fall again. Ant inspects him from top to toe with a frown.

Ant: "You look done in. Come on"

He pulls him inside and closes the door. Dec stands there nervous and conscious, unable to look Ant in his eyes.

Ant: "Hey, go and have something. You must be starving. Take a shower and come to the office room, okay?"

Dec felt as if his heart is running a mile in his chest.

Dec: "Ant, I am so sorry"

Ant sighs and takes Dec's face in his hands "Dec, take a shower, have something and we can talk okay?" And then he surprises Dec by leaning in and kissing his head "Now go"

Ant was sitting in his chair, going through the file before him when Dec entered with a cup of coffee. He was beyond nervous and has had a brilliant crying session under the shower. All he wanted was to cuddle inside the blankets or inside Ant's arms. But he has things to do...things to share...and then, Ant will decide his fate...he knew everything will end one day. But this soon? That won't happen, will that?

He places the cup on the table and sits on the chair beside Ant. Ant looks at him with a frown.

Ant: "My lap not enough for you now?"

Dec looks at him with hopeful eyes as a smile grew on Ant and he extended his arm. Dec wasn't expecting that   Didn't Stephen send the report yet? Of course he did. I saw him doing that!

Nevertheless Dec walks to Ant and sits on his lap. Ant hugs him close and Dec cuddles to him.

Dec: "You know what happened today?"

Ant nods and kisses Dec's forehead. Dec's heart flutters at that Does this mean that he has forgiven me?

Dec: "I am so sorry"

Tears sting his eyes and he hides him face in the crook of Ant's neck. He then feels Ant's palm on his head, stroking his hair.

Ant: "Why are you sorry?"

Dec: "That deal...didn't Stephen tell you?"

Ant: "Just why he had to call it off"

Dec: "Because of me"

Ant: "No, Dec. He told me how you were silent all along. You shouldn't have done that. You have every right to defend yourself. And I agree with Stephen's decision. That man insulted you Dec, and insulting you is like insulting me. Not only because you are my P.A. but also because I care about you. And the last thing I would do is work with someone who was disrespectful towards you. You got that?"

A soft whimper comes out of Dec and Ant looks down to his chest. He slowly rubs the tears in Dec's eyes.

Ant: "Drink this"

Dec takes in a deep breath and drinks the tea slowly, while Ant just watched him. Ant could feel Dec shivering and he wondered whether it is the cold or something else.

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