Taking Chances

Clarity

"How much do I love Matt?"

This was the question that played over and over in Sarah's head. Every waking moment she would ask herself if she loved him enough to let him go.

What she heard from Nic devastated her. She learned about the drivers' training program that was being opened to Matt; the first time that it was being offered to a Filipino. After completing the training, he had a real chance of making it to the F1 and become a hero for his country.

She researched Matt's racing history. She asked around his friends and family, searched the Internet for old articles on him as a driver. He was brilliant, a child prodigy that everyone was expecting to make it big one day.

Now Matt had a real shot at making dream a reality. And she's the only one that's stopping him.

She felt so selfish that she couldn't stand herself.

And yet the thought of being a thousand miles apart broke her. She hated the idea so much that at times she couldn't even breathe. The what ifs would torture her. What if he gets caught up with all the temptations that go along with being a racer. What if he finds someone better. What if he leaves her? It became so bad that her anxiety began affecting her health.

Nay Mayette arranged two weeks off for her so she can rest. Her manager thought that she was having sudden asthma attacks because of too much work.

"Magpahinga ka anak," Nay Mayette said, putting a hand on her shoulder"wag kang mag-aalala. Wag ka ring mappressure. Take as much time as you need to get healthy again. Mahal kita anak."   

And it didn't help that Matt once again put everything on hold to be by her side.

She was in bed watching Matt fuss over the medicines that she was about to take when his phone rang. He looked at the phone and quickly put it down the table beside the fruit juice that he made for her.

"Sweetheart, may mahalagang meeting ka diba. Bumalik ka na sa office. Ok lang ako." She started to sit up, slowly because her fever hasn't really gone down yet.

Matt rushed to help her up. "Tart, I promised your parents to take care of you habang nasa labas sila. Tsaka I already declined that meeting. Alam na dapat ni Dad yon. Don't worry your pretty little head about it, OK?" Matt smiled, lightly touching her forehead with his finger.

The phone rang again.

Matt stood up. He turned to face the window and answered the call. "Hello Dad... I told Rita to tell you that I couldn't make it..." 

Sarah could sense the tension in his voice. She bit her lip and did all she can to hold back the tears.

"Nasa meeting ka kasi kaya di ko nasabi sayo... I know... I'm really sorry Dad. May emergency ako e." 

When Matt turned around, he was all smiles. Clearly he was doing his best to make her feel that everything was OK.

"Kahit na naiipit ka na. Ako pa rin ang pinipili mo." Sarah said. Suddenly, tears were gushing down her cheeks.

In a second Matt was kneeling down beside her, kissing her hands. "Mahal, wag ganyan. If I was the one who's sick, you will take care of me din diba? Don't worry!" He laughed. "Wala yon. It's not as important as you think. Tama na OK?"

He stood up and wiped her tears with tissue and lovingly caressed her head. "Grabe, ang ganda kahit may sipon!!!!" Matt exclaimed, stepping back a bit as if wanting to get a better look.

"Shut up..." Sarah said, almost laughing at how OA Matt was. Her nose was clogged and her hair was ruffled. She was a complete mess in her pajamas. She knew she was nowhere near beautiful.