Chapter 9: I can still dream...

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Justin's POV:
I wanted to turn my car back around and finish what I started with Asher.
But I knew Joey wouldn't let me.
Fucking Joey!
If I was thinking logically, I would just call Charlie to check on Kennedy and then go home and get some damn sleep.
But I clearly wasn't thinking logically.
All I could think about was Kennedy's broken body and killing the pussy ass motherfucker that hurt her.
Beating him up wasn't enough.
I slammed my hands against the steering wheel.
"Fuck this fucking shit!
I don't need any of this right now!
I can't help her...I can't!
I'm no fucking good for her anyway.
Fuuuuuuuck!"
I had to stay away from Kennedy.
I could call Charlie and check on her, but that was it.
I needed to let her recover from this...without me.
She had Charlie now.
And I needed to focus on training.
Because anytime I was around her, she consumed me.
I lit a cigarette and turned up the music and started driving home.
I needed to sleep.
I'd just call Charlie real quick...
It's 2am, I wondered if he'd answer.
Should I just drive by the gym?
"Stop with the bullshit.
You stop by the gym...you ain't leaving.
Your a fucking pussy when it comes to that girl."
I started laughing hysterically at my subconscious.
These conversations I was having with myself were to fucking heated.
Plus my subconscious was right.
I would stay if I went there, and I'd probably never leave her side again.
She didn't need that.
So I called Charlie.

It rang and rang...then voicemail.
I hung up.
I don't do voicemail.
I continued driving home but I needed to know she was ok.
I called again.
And again.
And again.
Fuck...what if she wasn't ok?
I called again.
And I left a damn message.
"Charlie it's Bieber.
Just checking on Kennedy or Hailey...um..you know what I mean.
Just let her know that she should be safe from now on.
And no, I didn't kill anyone.
Just call me when you get this.
Anytime,I don't sleep much anyway.
Just call me back."
I hung up the phone and didn't even realize that I was driving in the direction of the gym.
I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep until I knew she was ok.
My body was still wound up from almost killing Asher.
I needed a release, and the gym was out of the question.
I picked up my phone and scrolled through the contacts.
I made the call.
Too easy.
Within 15 minutes I'd be buried deep inside Lexie.
All these feelings for Kennedy would melt away as I pounded into someone else.
The rage at Kennedy being attacked would simmer with my release.
"It won't work."
Shut the fuck up, I thought to myself.
It will. It has to.

Lexie opened the door wearing just a bra and panties.
Not gonna lie...she was sexy.
Her long dark hair was covering those huge tits of hers.
"Take your bra off."
She smirked, but did as I asked.
"Now pull your hair back and let me see you touch yourself."
Her breath hitched as I walked inside the door.
I watched as she slowly massaged her breasts.
For every step that I took...she took a step back.
I shut the door behind me and took my shirt off.
"Take your panties off and finger yourself."
Watching her fingers slide in and out of her wet pussy was doing absolutely nothing for me.
My damn dick was still sitting limp.
"Bieber I can play with myself anytime.
I want to ride that cock."
She was moaning and begging for me.
It still did nothing for me.
"Well come suck me off...then I'll fuck you to sleep."
She was on her knees in front of me in the blink of an eye.
She had my pants down and around my ankles and her mouth on my cock like a professional.
As she sucked and licked, I buried my hands in her hair.
Pushing her head to take me deeper.
It felt good, but I was barely getting hard.
My subconscious was giving me an eyeroll and wouldn't shut up.
I kept thinking about Kennedy.
Was she sleeping?
Did she need me there?
What would her lips around my cock feel like?
Instantly my dick tightened up.
And I couldn't help but picture Kennedy sucking and licking...taking all of me inside her pretty little mouth.
I could see her looking up at me as I moved faster against her tongue.
She looked so fucking beautiful on her knees in front of me.
It was enough to send my body over the edge.
I closed my eyes and held onto her head as I released into her mouth.
I was moaning and out of breath as I kept cumming.
"Kennedy, baby...I need you so bad.
I need to be inside you."
My dick went cold instantly.
The warm mouth, no longer there.
"Bieber! Seriously! Whose Kennedy?
And why didn't you just call her?"
My eyes snapped open, bringing me out of my daydream.
Kennedy was gone and a very annoyed Lexi was giving me a dirty look.
Her hands crossed over her chest.
"Are we even going to fuck?"
I thought about it for a second.
But after imagining Kennedys lips wrapped around me, I knew the answer.
"Nah.
But thanks for the blow."
I pulled my pants up and walked out the door.
I guess fucking was off the menu for stress relief.
The whole ride home was a fucking disaster.
Me and my subconscious bickering back and forth like little bitches.
Making me feel like shit.
"You can't keep treating women like toys."
Well...they don't complain.
"It doesn't matter. It's wrong."
People fuck and fly all the time.
"Yeah well it's not helping you anymore anyway."
Blah. Blah. Blah.
I just won't fuck then! Happy?
"Not quite. What about her?"
What about her?
Leave her out of this.
"Your the one imagining her sucking you off while someone else's lips are around you!"
I couldn't help it.
"I know."
I'm a sick bastard.
I can't get the image of her on her knees in front of me out of my mind.
"I'm you...Idiot...I can SEE that.
Just get home and take a cold shower."
But I need to see her.
"Not tonight Justin.
Not tonight."
Fine... Asshole...Fucking Fine!

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