Loved & Lost

First Born

Being back in town has been pretty decent. I've spent some time with my brother yet still haven't seen my mom because she's out on a mini vacay in Hawaii and won't be back until tomorrow and I haven't seen my dad because he's probably out somewhere being the slut that he is.

When I was younger, I thought my dad was the best. An idol in my eyes but really I was kidding my damn self. That changed at age ten when I had came home from my soccer game. I was so excited because it was the first time we won that I bust right into my dad's study and my eyes was stunned to see our housekeeper, Paola, sucking my dad's dick.

I rushed out that room so damn fast, you'd think I stole something. I was shocked and didn't know how to react because that was my dad and someone other than my mother along with the fact I just saw his dick which was gross. I just went downstairs to where my mom was and I couldn't say anything, couldn't even look at her.

All that night I was quiet which I knew my mom wanted to question me about because it wasn't in my nature to be quiet but before she could, my dad said he'd handle it. His version of handling it was telling me to keep my mouth shut and basically what I saw wasn't what it looked like. I'm ten not stupid, at the time I didn't know what the fuck a blow job was but I knew what she was doing was only meant for grown folks. Either way, I just knew it was wrong because he's with my mom and Paola wasn't old enough to drink yet.

I let it go for that moment because a part of me wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt while another part of me wanted to get evidence for it, so if my mom decided to not believe me then I could pull out the receipts. I guess after that time my father started being more careful but I still managed to catch him again.

It was two years later at the governor's ball, coming out of the janitor's closet with his fly down and his shirt fucked up while the governor's wife of New Jersey came out with her once pinned up hair now down and a nip slip along with her dress still being slightly hiked up. In that moment I was done trying to protect him and decided to tell my mom about his little escapades. This lead to a fight breaking out and she took a break from him for months almost a year.

Eventually, she just decided that she missed him and thought that maybe they could fix this since they've been married for so long. I love my mom so much but I feel like that was the dumbest decision that she could have made. Once a cheater, always a cheater is how I see it and if he can cheat on you than he never loved you because a person that loved you wouldn't dare cheat knowing that it will hurt you but she didn't see it that way. I know for a fact that my dad hasn't stopped cheating even if I haven't seen it but I guess my mom doesn't see the signs.

When I got to my parent's home, the place was silent minus the slight music playing in the background. More than likely it was coming from the game room and Royals is not even listening to it forreal because he's doing some shit on his phone or on the game.