Issues // H.S. // A.U.

Chapter Nineteen

HARRY

I never realized just how monotonous these parties were before Dani. They were all the same, drunk people milling around, beer pong being played in the backyard or garage, someone brings a bong and some shitty weed, and then you've got the ones who are walking upstairs to find a place to fuck.

I can't believe I used to be one of them. I can't believe I ever enjoyed a second of it. Now that I've had great, meaningful, sex I could never go back to that. Sex with Dani was like heaven. Every single time it was the best I've ever had, even the lazy morning sex where both of us are still tired and sleepy, making it take longer to reach our highs. Or the shower sex that took a bit of maneuvering to figure out the best position.

I've never laughed as hard or moaned as lewdly as I do with her. I've never felt a girl's walls surround me, no layer of latex in-between us to stop me from coating her insides. I wasn't even sure I bought into the idea of sex without a condom being that much better. I had never wanted to risk it with anyone before. Some girls had tried to tell me they were on the pill, but I wasn't willing to risk it.

With Dani... I would risk anything with her. She was everything to me. In the short amount of time I've known her, she had become the most important person in my life, so perfectly suited for me that I sometimes expected to wake up to this all being a dream.

I trusted Dani more than I trusted myself, and even if something did go wrong - go wrong wasn't even the right words. It was crazy to think that I wan't even freaking out at the idea of her getting pregnant. I didn't necessarily want that now, of course, but I was privileged enough to be able to support a kid, and let both of us finish college and chase careers.

We hadn't really talked about the future too much. We hadn't even said I love you yet, besides my little slip months ago, but I knew I wasn't going to ever feel this way again. She made me feel so comfortable in myself. She championed my hopes and desires like it was second nature.

It made nights like this, where she wasn't here yet, dull. She brought a light to me that I now craved all the time.

It wasn't like I wasn't having a good time. Andrew and Juliet were keeping me company on the couch, and I didn't feel like the third wheel which was great. I really liked Andrew. He was a calming presence, a stoic feel to him. I could understand how he was the first person Dani trusted when she came here.

"How are you feeling about finals in the next few weeks?" Andrew asked me.

I sigh, "Feeling solid right now. Need to work on my lit comp class, but otherwise I'm set."

Juliet groans, "I wish I was that confident. I've got to ace one final to pass, and the professor for one of my classes is making us take a pre-final so we can be prepared, but he's counting the grade!"

I grimace, "That's rough."

"Yeah, I-" She starts but stops abruptly, her eyes widening, face paling. Her eyes are looking over my shoulder, Andrew looking at her curiously, asking, "Jules, you okay?"

Her eyes dart to her boyfriend, "Uh, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. You know, it's getting kind of late. We should go-"

"Dani's not even here yet, though."

"I know, I'm just not feeling-"

"Nicole?"

I furrow my brows as a trio of people walked up to us, two guys and a girl. I didn't know who they were talking to at first, but then I remember that Dani told me that Juliet is her middle name, Nicole being her first.

"Oh my god, Nicole!" The girl shrieks excitedly, pulling her up from the couch, and into a hug.

Juliet seems to return it reluctantly, eyeing both the guys warily, "Hey, you guys."