l'effet mer

i don't usually do

i did not remain there so long;
(i don't usually do)
they told me i was not going to die, that it was all in my head. how can anyone tell you that what you feel or understand does only exist in your head? how can you possibly know?

if you listen to them, it is always in your head.
that is the whole point.

you don't usually open a door and find a thirteen year old girl looking at you as if you were the end of the world
that is why i left.

if i ever again feel that cold i know the world will stop turning instantly
i don't usually let my feelings control me
i never do it.
the only acceptable state is dullness
dullness
dullness
i had to stop this train of thoughts.
that was tedious!

(january, 2020)