Stuck With Me

30 | Moving on

Later that afternoon FP entered back into the house. He had drove around town for hours to clear his mind— with no success. He knew this was the ending, now it was the trick to find peace with that. Like he said before, Alice was too precious too lose. He didn't want to go on and mess it up real bad. The connection would always be there, with or without a romantic relationship.

Alice looked up from her book when she saw him entering, her eyes hopeful. Not that she had actually read any words, all she could think of was where FP could be. Luckily, he was back home now. Or actually, she was home again now he was back.

''Sorry for walking away. That was very immature.'' FP said quietly, feeling the guilt washing over him leaving her all alone while she was upset. They should have talked like adults, but at that time he was just too overwhelmed.

''It's fine. We both needed some time to cool off.'' Alice smiled slightly. She understood his reaction, part of her was even glad that they took a few hours apart to think things through. Truth was, she still had no idea where this would lead. Was this a deal breaker?

''And about us? What do we do now?'' Her voice sounded shy, afraid of hearing his answer. But she needed to know— he was the one in charge now. She couldn't give something he needed, and FP had the right to not be okay with that.

FP sighed and gestured for her to stand up by grabbing her hand. She took the hint and grabbed his hand even more firmly as she now faced him. He looked for a moment to how their hands fitted together so perfectly but quickly reminded himself about how that was just a fairytale he had made up in his mind. She just didn't feel the same way about him and he had to move on.

''Al, I like having you in my life. And it seems like we can't give each other what we need, at least not romantically. So if we want to save our bond maybe it's for the best that we go on as friends, don't you think?'' He stated quietly.

Part of him wanted to scream that he loved her, that he'd do anything to be with her. But what if she couldn't say those words back? Why would he confess something like that if he was so sure of getting his heart crushed?

''I like having you in my life too, FP. I don't want to lose you.'' Alice said with tears in her eyes.

Her mind spiraled to the day he had to leave if they messed up their relationship. She couldn't do that to Betty or Jughead. Things were too good now. They needed to protect that.

''You won't. Especially not if we make the right decision now to make sure we won't hurt the other.'' FP smiled softly. This was what was best. If they ended it before things got too intense they could save each other from some terrible heart break.

Alice returned his soft smile and wrapped her arms around his middle. He mirrored her movements and carefully embraced her, pulling her body as close as possible. Hugs like these weren't going to be a common thing anymore and it felt like he had to savor it one more time while he still could.

''You're my best friend, Forsythe.'' She mumbled sweetly, gripping into the back of his flannel as she said so.

The confession made his heart glow and hurt at the same time. He felt the same way. She was his best friend. But she was so much more than that.

''You are mine, Smith.'' He mumbled back, pressing one last sweet kiss on the top of her head. Alice held back her tears when she felt his lips softly toch the crown of her head, realizing that she lost this— that she lost him.

"Will there be a future for us, someday?" She asked quietly, her voice trembling.

FP couldn't really process her question, as he figured that she'd be more okay with this being over for good. But maybe part of her wanted to try again if they'd ever get a second chance.

"Only time will tell, Alice. We did the right thing." He said softly. It was a vague answer, but more than that he couldn't say. If he had to be honest he would have told her that trying again with her some day was all he wanted, but he held back those meaningful words.

It was the sad twinkle in her eyes that he now took the time to look at that suddenly made him doubt everything. That wasn't there before, was it? But this was Alice he was talking about. The woman he had a drunk kiss with. The woman who told him that he was the only fish in the sea she wanted. The woman who gave him the honor to sleep with her after so many years alone. The woman who trusted him with her daughter.

Was this maybe more to her than he gave her credit for? But what was reality and what did he wanted to see? Was this spark in her beautiful blue eyes for him or was it just something he had made up to convince himself that she returned his feelings. 

Even so, they made a decision. This was where it ended— for now. She was his best friend and he was hers. Could that be enough? Was it going to kill him if she got with someone else? Right now he wasn't sure about anything anymore. There was a possibilty that Alice loved him back, but the voices in his head told him that thought was just a fantasy. It wasn't there. She didn't return those feelings. Or does she?

**

Betty and Jughead had been over it all day on how to let their parents confess the truth about their affair. Confrontation didn't work, they tried that with the news paper already. They had to play it another way, something way more subtle and considerate. That is why they discussed the idea of Betty being the one to open up first. Maybe that way Alice felt like she could return the favor.

''Mom, can I talk to you for a second?'' Betty poked her head into her mother's bedroom, who was still reading the same book but she hadn't turned another page compared to this afternoon.

''Sure, honey. What is it?'' She placed her book aside and petted on the side of the bed for Betty to take place. It wasn't everyday that her daughter came here for some girl talk and she was glad that she had a distraction to focus on.

''It happened.'' Betty stated with a smile, thinking that her Mom would catch on to what she was referring too.

''What did?'' Alice raised her eye brow confused. Betty cleared her throat uncomfortably as she hadn't expected to have to say it out loud.

''Me and Jughead... We did it for the first time.'' She explained, a beaming smile spread across her face. It had been sometime ago, but this seemed like the perfect story to make Alice open up too. She loved it when Betty shared some more about her life.

''Oh baby, I am so happy for you. You're lucky to have a boy like Jughead.'' Alice said emotional, tears in her eyes as she realized that her little baby girl was a grown up now. Her first instinct was too panic but then she realized what FP had told her. Betty was lucky to share it with someone she cares about.

''Are you feeling okay?'' She asked her sweetly. Taking your relationship to the next level was something that could make you feel so different. It's something she recently experienced with FP. Being with him made her love her own body in a totally new way. Her mind wandered to the fact that she'd never feel his hands on her body anymore or that she'd never cuddle up to him ever again.

''I am feeling better than ever, Mom. He might be the one.'' Betty smiled shyly. Even though she confessed this because she wanted to get her mother to open up, it was still something she meant.

''I hope he is, sweetheart.'' Alice smiled sadly, kissing her daughter's forehead after. Betty sighed almost inaudible as she knew that no matter how much she'd tell— this wasn't going to work.

''You're going to find the one again too.'' Betty smiled softly. For some reason she could feel the tears sting in her eyes. All she wanted was for her mother to be happy, but her eyes told her another story. They looked so sad, so broken, as if she was hiding something bigger than just an affair.

''I know I will.'' She wanted to tell her daughter that she believed she had already found that person, but that was something she needed to get out of her mind. This wasn't about her and FP anymore. There wasn't an us. There wasn't a we. Just two friends with some history. Still, she made a wish that there was a future too.