M͓̽y͓̽ c͓̽o͓̽n͓̽v͓̽i͓̽c͓̽t͓̽ [B͓̽W͓̽W͓̽M͓̽]

20 - Confessions & Car SeX✔️

+Brandy

My mind feels like it's in a state of stillness as I inhale the smoke from my blunt. My red watery eyes stare at the night sky from the inside of my car, with my seat tilted back and heater blaring through the vents. This is the first time in days that I feel somewhat... relaxed. And even though I don't deserve to, I think it's what my mind, body, and soul need right now in order to keep me from blacking out.

I usually don't smoke unless it's a special occasion, but since I'm so stressed out these days, I thought, why the hell not.

Finally exhaling, I watch as the white smoke fills my surroundings before slowly disappearing.

It's been three days since the... incident and ever since then, I've been trapped inside the warehouse because of the hurricane. Three days here would've been nothing if it were just Elliot and me, but because the girls are here and of course my asshole of a baby father, it was awkward.

I had to deal with the strange looks from the girls, Elijah's pettiness and the lingering guilt embedded deep into my heart.

I'd say the hardest part about those three days was pretending that everything was alright.
For Elliot's sake, I made everything seem as normal as possible because that's what he deserves... normalcy. And even though I say I pretend for his sake, it feels as though I'm lying to him in a way.

Kinda like how my mom used to lie to me.

She'd smile in my face when our lights got cut off, but cry in bed later that night when she thought I was asleep. And ever since that one time, it became a pattern soon after that. She'd smile through her breast discomfort, working a double, an empty refrigerator, and even the notices left at the front door, along with the piling bills on the table.

And even though I was a kid when she did it, I always knew better...

It's crazy what some parents do in order to keep their kids happy.

A hard knock comes from my passenger side window, which startles me, making my body jump. I stare at the window with wide eyes watching as Elijah looks at me with his usual unreadable expression. He was supposed to be asleep... just like everyone else. He manages to knock on my window again, this time a little harder.

Placing my blunt in the car ashtray, I roll the window down a little bit. "Open up." My eyes close at the sound of his voice. It sounded so calm. He's been so angry these past few days, that I kinda forgot how his regular voice sounds like.

"I wanna be alone," I tell him looking anywhere but his eyes. "Go back inside, I'll be in there soon enough."

He doesn't move a mussel. "Open up, Brandy." He says again.

I sigh, rolling my eyes. Pressing the unlock button, Elijah opens the door and sits down in the passenger seat, before pressing the lock button. An awkward silence forms around us. "Can I..." I clear my throat. "You need something?" The words come out just as they were supposed to, sounding bold and hateful.

"Why are you outside in the middle of the night?" He asks, crossing his hands.

"Ain't it obvious." I pick up the bunt and inhale some more smoke. "I needed some time to myself. Now can you leave, you're disturbing my safe place." He says nothing, but his fingertips tap softly against his hands. "Are you here to curse me out some more?" I ask after a moment of silence. "Because if you are, please know that my ears are physically tired of hearing it."

"I'm not." Pause. "I'm not here to make you feel even worse." He tells me.

"Then why are you here?" I press.