jasper’s p.o.v.
i can’t get the way her deep, brown eyes looked clouded over two days ago. the blood, it was everywhere and it stained through my pants. i burned them in hope it’d burn that memory that’s still etched in my mind.
or how her face turned pale as a sheet and tears were making their way through the corners of her eyes. the way she looked strained, yet so… dead.
but she wasn’t.
and yet, it’s all my fault.
it’s been two days. two days and she’s still not waking up.
“there were a lot of complications during the surgical procedure, but she somehow got lucky and overcame the obstacles,” the surgeon said, looking up at us through his glasses and i was dirty and grimy, and still had her blood stains on my pants. i looked a mess but i didn’t care at all.
“how is she? is she okay?” her mom asked, tears clouding her vision. i couldn’t look at her. she couldn’t look at me.
he adjusted his glasses and shifted his feet. “she should be—“
“should?” i interrupt, my voice cracking and i hated how i sounded and i hated this moment. “what do you mean, “should”?”
he sighs lightly. “we got the bullet out, thankfully. it went through one of her vital organs, so we had trouble with that—“ val’s mom starts to sob and i try my hardest to block out that noise. “—but, she’s okay. she made it out alive and—“
“so, she’s okay?” i find myself asking.
he nods. “but—“
“oh, god,” i whisper to myself, bracing for the worst.
“but,” he repeats. “it’s only a matter of time until she wakes up. my estimate is a few days tops. she went through a traumatic situation, so that would be likely.”
traumatic situation. val went through that. the sweet, beautiful val went through that. and it’s all because of me. me, me, me.
“where’s valerie?” a female voice says loudly from the end of the hallway and i look up to see a girl with brunette hair and green eyes talking to the receptionist. i don’t recognize her and i’ve never seen her before, so i slowly walk up to the desk and the receptionist is talking to her and the girl is not having any of it.
“her mom called me and said she was here… i’m her best friend!”
i stop in my tracks and she must notice my appearance because she looks at me her eyes go wide. she runs up to me and hugs me and it’s all too weird and i don’t know what to do. i freeze in response.
“who—“
“jasmine,” she says, pulling away. “call me jay, that’s what val calls me.”
sudden realization struck me and this is jay. the girl who was there for valerie when i was with them. when i disappeared. “you’re jay?” i ask quietly. she nods and she wipes her eyes with the back of her sleeve. “i thought you—“
“were studying abroad?” she asks. i nod and she sighs. “i-i got a call from val’s mom and she told me all these things that i didn’t believe and—“ she stops to take a breath and she goes to sit down in the nearest hospital chair. i sit down next to her and stare straight ahead. “i just had to come back to see her,” she whispers. “i couldn’t just stay there, i wanted to, i needed—“
